Near Unto Thee

Lots to Learn

2012-01-23T17:13:00.000-08:00

I am looking forward to learning a lot this week! I met with my accountability partner this morning after a unintentional break of 6 weeks - it's amazing how much the Lord can do in that amount of time. We had so many things to celebrate this morning, whereas we typically have more burdens and prayer requests. Refreshing.

Wednesday night is our Not A Fan small groups at church, which I have been thoroughly enjoying. I read the chapters today & underlined a TON for this week. Oh boy.

I get to go to the Worship symposium at Calvin all day Thursday. As well as attending the sessions, I was invited to join in a choir for Thursday morning and evening. I haven't sang in a choir since I lived in Oakland and was one of three white girls with not much rhythm singing in a Gospel Choir who had a LOT of rhythm. Should be fun, although I'm still waiting to get the music...I don't even know what we're singing yet!

Friday & Saturday I'll be in Chicago at a Youth Specialties conference! I'm heading out early Friday morning with another youth pastor friend & Marc is meeting me in Chicago Friday night with the kids. Saturday when I'm done, we'll head to a dear friends house for the night and arrive home later Sunday evening.

Praying for a clear and focused mind this week so I can soak up all the wonderful things I can learn from others!

Updates

2012-01-19T14:41:00.000-08:00

* Isaac is 4!!! How did my baby become a 4 year old?

* I'm done with my class after today! I start another class in a week or so. I have this spring class, a week long class in August, a class in the fall and then I'm DONE with my Masters! I also have to complete the requirements for my internship and take Oral Comps next spring, but my course work is nearing the end!

* I'm LOVING the small groups we're doing at church with the "Not A Fan" book by Kyle Idelman. Our group is diverse and different - I'm being challenged and convicted in many ways.

* Trying to figure out where to put Isaac next year for school. Another year in preschool at Evergreen? Transitions class at GRCES? Something else?

* Hope is 16 months old as of Sunday. She's still not walking or talking much. We go back to the doc in March to see if they'll want to get Early Childhood involved for some physical & speech therapy.

* I love the show "The Electric Company". I'm glad Isaac does, too.

* I'm behind on my Bible reading. Getting the stomach flu last week got me pretty behind. Still trying to catch up.

* Chuck will be moving back to China next week Wednesday. Lots of reasons why. Please pray for him as he makes this transition, and for us as we adjust to one less family member.

* Looks like Marc might be coaching Cross Country at WMC next fall. Fun!

* Trying to find a place to go with my sister's fam and my parents for a week this summer. We've never done anything like this before - I"m SO excited about it!

* Our closing on Quimby is on or before February 20th. We will still have to make some payments, but I'm SOOOOO excited to have an end in sight for this!

* I'm getting a 'deprogrammer' to wear at night (a mouth appliance much like a retainer) to help with my 'clenching'. Hoping this reduces the constant jaw popping and headaches.

* Getting excited about the many trips happening this year: DR over spring break, Colorado Challenge in early July and SERVE in late July. Who wants to watch my kids while I do all these cool thing? No - seriously - who wants 'em? I love these opportunities, but it is much harder with children. I have to rely so much on my family and friends to help care for them while I"m gone. I can't wait (well, I can really if I'm honest) until they're old enough to go on these trips!

Did you get any presents?

2012-01-16T11:42:00.000-08:00

This is a post-Christmas blog, though a bit later than I intended. I've been mulling over some thoughts that at first merely annoyed me, and since have become in my mind only symptoms of a larger and more perverse problem with the church.

Christmas morning we walk up the stairs into the church to be greeted by an elder. We shake hands and he looks down at Isaac and says, "So, did you get any presents yet? What did you get?". A simply question. A fitting question as it was Christmas day & Christmas = presents in our culture. I was slightly annoyed at the time. What if Marc and I had chosen to not give presents this year? Or what if we didn't have money to? How would a 4 year old feel and then respond if they hadn't gotten any presents?

Now, as I've been thinking about it for a few weeks, it almost angers me. Perhaps I'm over thinking things. I probably am. However, we were entering church to celebrate CHRIST and his birth. We are bringing our child in to worship with us to hear about the baby Jesus born to us.

Do we want to, in the church, reinforce the cultural ideas of Christmas that its all about presents and getting crap? NO! So why is "Have you gotten any presents yet?" the first question asked when I enter church on Christmas day? Why not a question like, "Isaac, how are you celebrating Jesus birthday today?" or "Merry Christmas Isaac! Jesus is the best Christmas present of all, isn't he?".

It reminds me of an article that circulated on facebook a few months back about how we always compliment little girls on their clothes, hair and general appearance, rather than their mind and intellect. It's the subtle questions we ask or compliments we give that are in all actuality, probably doing more harm than good.

I realize the elder didn't have all these thoughts in mind as he asked Isaac the question. I was grateful he stooped down to talk to Isaac and greet him. He was trying to include my 4 year old, and I am thankful. I just wish we would all - the church included - would be more intentional about the questions we ask and what the message is that underlies the question.

A Gift from God

2012-01-05T18:50:00.000-08:00

Those are the exact words my pain management doctor used 2 weeks ago when I saw him last. He asked to what percentage my last injection had helped: 95%. He asked how long it had helped: it's still working. That's when he said, "Well, that's a gift from God. Nothing I could do would give those results. It's almost reportable that you're still pain free".

What a gift.

About 1 year ago I finally gave in and called my doctor for an appointment to deal with the back pain I had been experiencing for far too long. He referred me to physical therapy. I did about 2 months of that with zero relief. My doctor referred me to a back doctor. She took X rays & did an MRI. Results? Slight deterioration of my L5 disc - she called it 'barely clinically significant'. So, she sent me to a different physical therapist who dealt specifically with issues relating to back pain and childbirth. The thought was that my pelvic floor was too weak and I was overcompensating with my back. A few more months of physical therapy. Lots of money down the drain with no relief.

Next doctor up to bat was Dr. Winston at the Michigan Pain consultants. There's something defeating about going to a pain doctor. It seems like no one can figure out what the cause is, so we'll just try to get rid of the pain. He was the most helpful of all, however! He had a bone scan done and determined the same deterioration of my L5 disc, as well as some issues with my sacrum. Then we started various injections to pinpoint which of the 2 issues the pain was stemming from. First injection was about 30% helpful for about 3 weeks. Second injection wasn't helpful at all. Third injection didn't work. Forth injection...ahhh that glorious forth injection! I stood up from the table & had to sit in the wheelchair to recovery. I stood up to get into the recovery bed & the nurse asked me to do a little back twist, which normally caused pain immediately. NO PAIN! I started bawling. They thought it hadn't worked, but through my tears I said, "No, it worked, I don't feel any pain!" Lo and behold, that 'barley clinically significant' deterioration of my L5 disc was indeed the culprit!

In September, I started a Bible study at church & was asked to write a letter to God about the longings of my heart. Our Quimby house was first item on the list, followed by pain relief. I'm amazed at how God has listened to the desires of my heart and answered. Sure, my back isn't 100% better, and there is the likelihood that more injections and possibly surgery will be needed in the future, but I've been pain free for 8 weeks straight! And we found out today that our sale on Quimby was approved. We will still owe money on it, but the payments we will make are interest free, and it's still a much better situation than what it could be.

I am blessed with the gifts God has given me!

New Years Resolutions

2011-12-31T20:38:00.000-08:00

I'm plowing full steam ahead into 2012 - resolutions & all! Happy New Year!

Here they are - the serious, the silly and the simple. Cheers to a new year of God's grace, mercy, peace, love, forgiveness, provision, healing, and faithfulness.

Great is Thy faithfulness, oh God my Father;
There is no shadow of turning with Thee;
Thou changest not, Thy compassions, they fail not;
As Thou hast been, Thou forever wilt be.

Great is Thy faithfulness! Great is Thy faithfulness!
Morning by morning new mercies I see.
All I have needed Thy hand hath provided;
Great is Thy faithfulness, Lord, unto me!

Summer and winter and springtime and harvest,
Sun, moon, and stars in their courses above
Join with all nature in manifold witness
to Thy great faithfulness, mercy and love.

Great is Thy faithfulness! Great is Thy faithfulness!
Morning by morning new mercies I see.
All I have needed Thy hand hath provided;
Great is Thy faithfulness, Lord, unto me!

Pardon for sin and a peace that endureth
Thine own dear presence to cheer and to guide;
Strength for today and bright hope for tomorrow,
Blessings all mine, with ten thousand beside!

Great is Thy faithfulness! Great is Thy faithfulness!
Morning by morning new mercies I see.
All I have needed Thy hand hath provided;
Great is Thy faithfulness, Lord, unto me!

New Years Resolutions 2012

Read 3650 chapters of the Bible in 365 days. That's 10 chapters a day. I'm joining a group of over 1,000 who are taking this challenge. There is a 'system' in place to follow - see this link for info on the plan. I'm excited to, as others have put it, "drink from the fire hose" of the Word. I'm looking forward to seeing connections in Scripture that maybe I haven't seen before. I'm anxious to wear out the pages of my Bible this year.
Pay off debt. Marc and I have yet to figure out the specifics of this one, cause I'm all about measurable and realistic goals. :) All I know is that after building the emergency fund a bit, all the rest of our tax return money is going to paying off debt.
Build a better routine. I always struggle with being disciplined. I need the Spirits help to do this, cause I've tried in my own strength and I fail each time. I'm longing for more routine for my kids and me - especially the days that I'm working from home.
Try a new recipe each week. Some weeks I'm awesome at meal planning and thinks go according to it. Other weeks, I wander through the aisles of the store & pick random things to make (and I always leave out a key ingredient when I don't have a list!). I want to be more adventurous in what I make. I already bought Teff flour so I can try to make Injera (sourdough pancake-like bread that is a staple of Ethiopian food).
Use all my lotion. Hokey Pete. I cleaned out the closet in our bathroom last night. I have an entire shelf of lotions. And most of them are completely full. I get lotion a lot as gifts, which is awesome, but I'm not much of a lotion-user. That's going to change this year. In my effort to purge some of the clutter in my life and house, I'm going to be an avid lotion user this year! My skin will thank me, I'm sure.
Be more crafty with the kids. Okay, so Hope can't really participate a whole lot in crafts, but Isaac can! Tonight we already started this one by making Thank You cards for his teachers, rather than using some that I have. He got to color, use stickers & dictate what to write in each one. He loved it & way more fun than a store bought card! (Sidenote: When I asked Isaac what to write in his card for the teachers assistant, this is what he told me: "Dear Mrs. F. I love you SOO much. I love you forever. Love, Isaac." We toned it down slightly from that. Ha!)
Pray more diligently for those who don't know the Lord. I taught Children & Worship for 4 weeks in December. One of the kids consistently prayed for people who don't know God. Here is this 6 year old doing something that I should be doing as well! This needs to happen more. In fact, prayer in general needs to happen more.
Focus on healthy habits. I've strayed from the WW wagon & need to focus a bit more on having a healthy lifestyle - exercise, water, healthy foods, being outdoors, etc.
Play WITH my kids more. This goes back to the routine with working at home. Sometimes while I'm home, I'm working and cannot play. Other times, I should be playing with my kids and not working. I need to play more.
I need to work on being the wife God has called me to be. Marc and I have been so independent throughout our marriage - somewhat because that's our personalities - somewhat because of differing schedules - but now we have the chance to become more unified. I need to learn how to do that more intentionally.

My little Peanut

2011-12-16T17:33:00.000-08:00

Hope had her 15 month well child visit today. I was anxious to see if her body had started catching up with her head yet, and also wanted to hear what the doc thought about her lack of standing/walking and speech.

She weighed in a whoppin' 19.75lbs, keeping her in the 10% for weight. Don't know where this is coming from! She started out at 8lbs 12oz and the doc says her 'DNA is kicking in' and that she'll probably be a bit smaller. Seriously? Um, she's healthy so I don't care, but her DNA comes from me & Marc, right? Yeah, cause we're definitely not in the 10% for our weights/heights/age!

She was 30 inches long, keeping her in the 50% for height. We're going to end up with a 6'4 Isaac and a 5'4 Hope. :)

And her head - still WAY off the charts. There was a slight increase in the curve she's been following, but nothing too alarming. I was hoping for a bit more of a decrease to bring her back into the 'normal' range, but I guess it's all just numbers. I think my daughter is a beauty - big head and all.

Developmentally, she's not considered 'behind' quite yet, but is on the tail, tail end of where she should be. She's still only saying 'Ma-Ma' and 'Da-Da'. Nothing more, although something I think she tries to say book or dog, but they all kind of sound the same. She doesn't babble. She doesn't try to imitate sounds. She's doing well with pointing at things, and it's clear she can understand when I ask her questions. She can go around the dining room table & point to all 7 of us correctly. She doesn't have a problem hearing or understanding, just potentially getting the sounds out.

As for walking, the doc says they like to see kids walking on their own by 16 months and to continue to practice with her. I look at her skinny little legs & wonder how her muscles can even hold her up sometimes - talk about chicken legs!!

Typically kids don't have an 18 month check up, but our doc thought it would be wise to see where she's at physically & developmentally. If she's still on the tail, tail end of things, our doc would like to call in early childhood people to help with some physical and speech therapy.

Overall, she's healthy and boy is she a happy thing! Although after 4 shots and about 4 teeth about to break through, today is quite possibly the crabbiest I've ever seen her. Poor little peanut!

The Christmas Conundrum

2011-12-13T09:25:00.000-08:00

The Christmas Conundrum

This is a MUST read for all Christians who are struggling with how to 'do' Christmas in our culture of materialism and entitlement.

Energized

2011-12-11T19:07:00.000-08:00

Yesterday I had a middle school/high school event from 6:45am - 6:45pm. A kind man from our church wanted to bring us to a Christmas pageant in Shipshewana, Indiana for FREE! So, we had almost 20 students load up the coach (which had individual cup holders & foot rests - talk about riding in luxury!) and drive the few hours South. The other 2/3rds of the bus was made of up a handful of Plymouth folks + people who come to our church's mobile food pantry, who also got a FREE invitation.

I focused my energy mostly on some great bus ride conversations with my kids and relationship building during the day. I would go again just for the bus trip! We got to Shipshe & walked around a bit to the different shops and then went to the restaurant for lunch. There was a HUGE banquet room for our bus + about 3 other bus loads of people. I sat with 4 of my students in the middle of a group of strangers. I introduced myself to my neighbor and she said, "I rode the bus with you!". Duh. Kinda felt like an idiot. Anyhow, we converse all throughout lunch and I learn of her children and grandchildren. She learns about my role at PHCRC. She's got 2 grand kids in middle school. We've got our Breakaway Christmas party Sunday night. You can see where this is going, right?

So tonight at Breakaway, in walks my new friend and her two grandkids, S & B. B is a 6th grade girl (as are ALL of my girls in Breakaway) and S is an 8th grade boy (as are a majority of my boys in Breakaway). I meet them, give them the nickle tour of the youth room & start to introduce them around. They seem apprehensive at first. B started to come out of her shell pretty quickly. S got invited into a game of pool with a college leader (awesome work DS). Dinner comes. B sits with all the kids. S sits in the game room against the wall by himself. I invite him to join us, he refused. A few minutes passes & I send guy leader DS in to interact. They talk. I still can't tell if he's forced to be there or has any desire whatsoever.

We played a guessing game - guess how many hershey's kisses are in the cheap dollar store container? 97.
S guesses the closest & WINS! We see how awesome of a smile he's got. He began to engage.

More games, more games, more games. Then, it's time to get serious and focus on why we are even at church in the first place. We watched THIS video to quiet us and focus us. Then I led a lectio devina on Luke 2:1-20. I explained it as best as I could, hoping the newbies wouldn't think we're a weird cult-like place. :) We meditated on the Christmas story. Then I had them journal. B & S journaled right along with the rest of them. They wrote down their prayer requests like the rest of them. They gave me their address so I can send more information about the group. They left with Grandma & I hope to see them again.

They seemed like any other kids who come to a new place for the first time. But here is the coolest part. I don't know if these kids have EVER heard the Christmas story. There mom doesn't believe in church. They're grandma is Catholic and I'm not sure how engaged she is anywhere. They've been evicted from their apartment with their mom and are living with their grandma during the week and with grandpa, mom and others in a 1 bedroom apartment on the weekend. When they see their dad, it's at his fiances parents house where they live. They don't have a church home. They don't have many friends due to too many moves in the last 4 years. Grandma wants to get them plugged in somewhere, and God brought them to the PHCRC family through a series of his Sovereign events.

So, long story for a simple but exciting point that I am energized and thrilled that the Lord has brought them to Breakaway. Please pray for them and Grandma. Please pray for me and the other leaders. Wow. Sharing God's love with people who may or may not already know it is such a privilege. I pray for more opportunities, and for obedience when I'm given them.

Small Vent

2011-12-08T13:51:00.000-08:00

So, a quick vent because I feel the need. I cook for 7 people on a regular basis. I don't always have much time. I repeat meals at times. Sorry. Deal with it. Cook for 7 people every night & see how often you repeat meals. So when someone opens the crock pot & says "again?" when I've only made this 2 times before, it's a little annoying. I'm annoyed. Be thankful I cook at all, and that I cook MEAT for pete's sake. Be thankful because we are blessed. Ugh. Vent over.

Made you laugh!

2011-12-05T17:18:00.000-08:00

Hope the old picture made you laugh! It made me bust a gut when I came across it earlier today!

I have so many things I could write about, but my thoughts are so all over the place these days, I can't sit down and focus on one thought for longer than a few minutes. Maybe I'm ADD. :)

Thursday Peace

2011-11-17T11:51:00.000-08:00

Thursdays are busy. I work from 9 - 12:30pm. Come home, feed the kids lunch (although my parents who babysit often get a jump start on this for me) and bring Isaac to school. Meanwhile, my sister drops off her youngest. I come home, get Hope down for a nap and hang out with Simon for about 45 minutes and then we get to entertain another little one from 2pm - 3:30pm.

It's amazing that between the feeding, naps, 2 additional kids, trips to school and trying to get a few minutes of work in, I find such peace. I often put on a Kids Praise CD while the kids are up between 2 - 3 and find it brings so much peace to the house. It helps me focus on God during one of the 'mundane' tasks of my day. Yes, the kids sometimes fuss and cry and need a lot of attention, but it's just so peaceful to not have the TV on, and it certainly helps that none of the 3 kids around right now can really talk my ear off like Isaac sometimes can! :)

2 years

2011-10-21T11:22:00.000-07:00

2 years ago today I found out that we had lost our baby at just over 10 weeks. 2 years ago tomorrow is when I miscarried.

It's amazing how much healing God has brought through those 2 years. He has brought us HOPE - both literally and emotionally. He has shown us his unending faithfulness. He has offered us comfort. He has allowed us to use our pain and experience to minister and encourage others. He has provided. He has brought us joy through community.

My heart still aches for the little one we will not meet this side of heaven, but I am encouraged in knowing that my little one is in the Father's arms and He loves our baby even more than we can imagine.

And in a week that could prove to be difficult as I remember what was happening 2 years ago, God has once again been offering us so many answers to prayer. I am blessed.

Heaven?

2011-10-18T19:31:00.000-07:00

How do you explain Heaven to a 3 year old?

The other day when Officer Slot was killed, I had the news on and Isaac was enthralled by the police cars he saw on TV. He asked about it and I told him a simple version of what happened.

Tonight, we went to our neighborhood association meeting. There was a police officer there and Isaac was SO excited to go say "Hi" to him. When we left, he wanted to run back in because he "forgot to tell him something". We didn't go back in, but I asked Isaac about what he wanted to tell him. He said he wanted to tell the officer that another police officer died last week. I told Isaac that Officer Slot was a friend of the officer we just met. Isaac got a really concerned look on his face, and I said, "That's pretty sad, isn't it buddy. Should we pray for Officer Slots family?" His response? "YES! We should pray that he comes back to life again." The faith of a child. He certainly listens when we read stories of Jesus bringing healing and life to many in the Bible. He got a little smile and said, "I know where the police officer is!" "Where?" "In heaven!". I told him he was correct and that heaven was a beautiful place where we get to be with God forever. He asked if the officer was going to be back for his next birthday, as if Heaven were across the country or a mere plane trip away. I told him no, and that he wouldn't be able to come back to life and be with his family like he hoped. Isaac literally teared up and told me he didn't want to go to Heaven.

Oh how I wish I could have tape recorded the conversation that followed about what heaven is and what it isn't, who would be there and why people get to go, and how old will we be when we die, and if Young is going to be in heaven, and how he's already seen Adam & Eve in the bible, so he doesn't need to meet them, and how he thinks it would be so cool to have a body that doesn't get hurt and on and on it went...

How do you explain heaven to a 3 year old?

Tuned in

2011-10-17T20:23:00.000-07:00

On Sunday, our high school youth group had a retreat day at Camp Roger with Church of the Servant and Alger Park. We did the adventure course, had some yummy crock pot soup/chili, and worshiped by the campfire. It was a gorgeous day to be outdoors enjoying God's creativity in nature.

The other youth pastors & I planned and led the worship, which had two themes. First, we tied into the idea of belaying on the ropes course. We gave each student a carabiner and read through Psalm 121 (Read here). We asked the students who or what they were attaching their carabiner to throughout their days - God or red bull or video games or.... you get the idea. If you are attaching it to your music, when you start to 'fall' - is your music going to save you?

¹ I lift up my eyes to the mountains—
where does my help come from?
² My help comes from the LORD,
the Maker of heaven and earth.

The second theme was that of being tuned in. We sat in silence with our eyes closed while one of the other youth pastors had a old school dial radio that she was 'tuning' and stopping on various stations - some were clear (we got to hear part of the song 'addicted to love') and others completely static. We talked about the noise that is in our daily lives and how that makes it so difficult to tune in to God.

Then I talked about the noise Jesus must have had in his life: pharisees questioning him, disciples following him, whole towns arriving on his doorstep to have him heal their sick and demon possessed. Yet he always connected to the Father. He went off to solitary places to pray. Early in the morning. I made an assumption that when Jesus went off to pray - I doubt he talked the whole time. I'm pretty sure he listened, too. We're not very good at that - in life and in prayer. I like the sound of my own voice too much, and for some reason, I think what I have to say to God is much more important than what he has to say to me. I then led a Lectio Divina on Psalm 121. We ended by singing "Be Still and Know".

³ He will not let your foot slip—
he who watches over you will not slumber;
⁴ indeed, he who watches over Israel
will neither slumber nor sleep.

We challenged the students to try to eliminate some of the noise in their lives and listen to God.

SO...(here's the real point to my post) Tonight as I was driving to my dear friends house to hold a Blessings Unlimited gathering, I turned off the radio in my car and eliminated some noise. I sang, "Great is Thy Faithfulness". I needed to remind myself about the amazing faithfulness of my Father. I forget. I'm like an Israelite. And that song just came to me to sing. I felt prompted to sing it. And I felt a peace wash over me.

⁵ The LORD watches over you—
the LORD is your shade at your right hand;
⁶ the sun will not harm you by day,
nor the moon by night.

You see, the thing I attach my carabiner to is my money. Not because I have ~~a lot~~ any. Not because I think it will save me. Not because I want to be rich. But my identity is attached to my lack of money. To my debt. I feel like I want so badly to unhook myself from it, but I can't. It's dragging me down and I kind of trust that God will help me.

Oh, and I requested from our church council that I stay at 30 hours a week, rather than be reduced to 25 hours a week. My request was denied. I know there are reasons, but when I found out on Sunday, I felt my heart drop out from inside me. Five hours less to do my job? YIKES! Five hours less from my paycheck? YIKES! Fear set in.

BUT, GREAT IS THEY FAITHFULNESS.

I prayed about this Blessings Unlimited gathering all day. I'm praying for God's favor on this business adventure of mine - that it might help us be released from this sinking ship of debt. And wouldn't you know it? God heard me (oh wait - he always does). The gathering itself was delightful - a great group of women gathered - and the hostess was top notch. ;) The sales went well, but better than that - 2 women set dates to host a gathering themselves, AND someone wants to start selling. That means I will be 'promoted' to team leader rather than just consultant. WHOO HOO! :)

And to top it off, on my way home, I got good news regarding a few of our medical bills that will be covered.

It truly felt like a night of Blessings Unlimited!

⁷ The LORD will keep you from all harm—
he will watch over your life;
⁸ the LORD will watch over your coming and going
both now and forevermore.

Ugh.

2011-10-04T14:34:00.000-07:00

That's how I've been feeling lately. Ugh.

I think it's a combination of many different things, but the main one being my stinkin' hormones. Since Hope quit nursing I have been reminded of the ups and downs of non-pregnant-non-nursing hormones. And let me tell you - they ain't pretty! I feel like a 14 year old girl again battling zits and insecurity. I think Marc is often wondering if there are small animals living in our shower drain, but no, it's just all the hair I lose each and every day. My exhaustion is reminiscent of my first trimester of pregnancy (and no, I'm not). On top of the hormones, my ugh-ness is steming from NOTHING happening with Quimby and me starting to really second guess having it on the market and not finding renters. It felt like such a clear decision back in June/July. And now, after reducing it over $15k since we originally put it up and still no movement, I'm daily anxious about what this means for our credit, our integrity, our responsibility. Some days it feels like too much to bear, but I realize it's such a small thing compared to the suffering in the world around me.

I just long for freedom from Quimby and from debt more than I can articulate. It is the deep longing of my heart, and I think I would collapse in silent but grateful tears if either happened. I honestly cannot fathom a life without either, and feel so completely enslaved by them both that it starts to suck my joy dry.

I am continually asking the Lord to remove these burdens, and it's hard after 3 years of dealing with Quimby to have made no progress at all. Why?

In my Bible study this week, this short paragraph popped out at me:

"What will we do when we can't explain what Jesus is doing? Will we remain nearby when He doesn't stop a tragedy? Based on earthly evidence, human reasoning concludes that He is either mean or weak. Think, Beloved, about what I'm saying. Will we cling when our human reasoning implies that evil has defeated Him? Or that evil seems to be found in Him? Will we stand by faith when human logic says to run? That's what will make us different."

I'm trying to trust and remain near unto God when I can't explain why he's not answering our prayers. Please pray for us to learn what God wants us to learn, for us to remain faithful to our very faithful God, and for my anxiety and ugh-ness to dissipate into peace and joy.

To Be Near...

2011-09-13T13:11:00.000-07:00

In my first reading of this book, the focus is on being near to God. Being near to God, and to claim to love God means more than just a deep respect or admiration. It's realizing that God is the Good Shepherd, and he is Our Shepherd. He is so personal and intimate, it's hard to describe our walk with Him in words. The part of this reading that sticks out to me currently is this:

"We can spend much of our lives without that closeness, sometimes desolate and forsaken. But if we know God's nearness, we know that in those moments of alienation nothing is so desirable as his return. What we seek, we find only in our return - he is near once again. Those moments, beyond description, are the great moments of our lives."

I believe what he is talking about is more than just a spiritual high. I think being Near Unto God is much more than the warm, fuzzy feeling you get when you sing your favorite worship song. Too often I fear students in my youth ministry are looking for the next spiritual high. In fact, I know they are. They tell me they are. They've been trained (hopefully not by me, but let's be real, I'm sure I've got some blame to take) to seek the next 'mountain top' experience. But we can't live on the mountain top. We live in the valleys, in the plains, wandering, on a journey. We need to recognize God's hand in our lives even when we may not 'feel' him.

It's my nephews birthday today. He is nine. I'm sure if I ask him later tonight when I see him, how does it feel to be nine, he will probably respond 'not much different'. The fact is that he is nine, despite if he feels nine or not. The fact is that God is ever-present, despite if we feel him or not. And yes, there may be times in our lives when we truly feel the nearness of God in our lives. Those are incredible moments of joy, and I treasure them with all of my heart. But let us learn to be Near Unto God in the valleys as well as the mountaintops; as we're wandering and while we're resting.

Quimby Update

2011-09-09T19:02:00.001-07:00

We have an offer. AN OFFER! It's low. INCREDIBLY LOW. But, it's an offer.

We are counter offering.

Praying. Waiting. Hoping.

Please Lord, lift this burden from us!

my title

2011-09-06T19:35:00.000-07:00

The title of my blog is : Near Unto Thee

"But as for me, it is good to be near God. I have made the Sovereign LORD my refuge; I will tell of all your deeds." Psalm 73:28

I've recently started reading a devotional with the same name as my blog. As we have been rearranging our house/rooms to make room for our new student, I came across the book. It's one of Marc's that I've never seen or paid attention to before. The book is a collection of meditations written by Abraham Kuyper and I have found it very encouraging so far. I think I'm going to use my blog to write a few thoughts on these meditations as I read them. I'm hoping it will be a way for me to further internalize what I'm reading, and perhaps be a source of encouragement to others as well. I want this blog to truly be a place where I tell of all the Lords deeds and reflect upon what life looks like as I draw near to Him.

Blessings Unlimited

2011-09-01T13:23:00.000-07:00

So, I'm pretty sure I'm going to begin home sales with Blessings Unlimited. It's fairly risk free, I enjoy their product line and think many others in my life will too. I can do as much or as little as I want, can work around my family's schedule, and it will hopefully cover some of our unexpected expenses this fall (medical bills not covered by my insurance). I'm really looking forward to it, and hope that some of you out in blog world might host a party to help me get started!

I thought that with a name like Blessings Unlimited, I should reflect on what all my blessings are. It's been too long since I've dedicated a post to how Good GOD is. So, this is that post.

* Perhaps the most obvious blessing recently is Marc's new job. We are thrilled with how God has brought together Marc's love for English with our experience of hosting international students.

* Hope is healthy! Despite the concerns we had a few months ago, she is continuing to grow and is healthy from what we can see. She had another follow up appointment, but I expect her to be just fine!

* We don't have to move. While Marc and I do feel restless at times in GR, it would have been a lot of work in a short amount of time if we would have had to move for his job.

* We have parents who are involved in our kids lives. I'm grateful for that.

* I have AMAZING friends. Hearts of Gold surround me in them. I am encouraged, convicted, challenged and humbled by them.

* I have a full house. We leave for the airport to pick up Young in about 30 minutes. Our total will be up to 7 and I couldn't be more excited! Chuck is quiet and does stick to himself a bit, but just wait, we'll draw him out!

* We get new insurance starting today! Whoo Hoo! My insurance at church has changed 3 times in 4 years, and because of our latest & greatest, we have a few thousand dollars worth of medical bills that we have zero money for in the HSA. I'm ready to have better coverage and not to have to worry encountering the same thing in the future.

* We are blessed with an incredible home to live in. I am often in awe of the space we have - indoors and out. And we are blessed with the items in our home (although sometimes the kids toys feel more like a curse).

* We have a playground across the street. And a few blocks away. And a few blocks the other way.

* We are getting to know our neighbors more. I love this. This summer, I have met Chad, Liz, Robert and Cyndi. I've talked to a few others that I don't remember names of . :(

* We have a new road outside the house and a new roof on the house!

* Isaac is going to preschool, and he's really enjoying it! He's got great teachers and we get to walk to school!

* My husband is such a blessing. He is hard working, supportive, loving and caring. It's been an interesting transition to be on similar schedules again, but we are communicating through it all and celebrating our new found time together! It was a blessing to celebrate our 6th anniversary while camping at the Conference Grounds. The focus that week was on marriage, and we had some good conversations based on what the speakers said.

Well, I have to go get Young! :)

Blessings Unlimited

2011-08-28T13:57:00.001-07:00

http://digital.myemags.biz/issue/38030

I'm thinking of starting to do home sales through this company. Take a look & give me your thoughts!

Du - du- du- dum

2011-08-23T19:11:00.000-07:00

A quick blog shout out to my sister in law, Jen, who got married ALMOST A MONTH AGO! Whoa, it's been a bit too long since I've updated. Anyhow, a few highlights from the big day.

I borrowed a tux from a friend of mine from college. She sent it to me, and I had Isaac try on everything...except the shoes. They were the right size - they'll fit, right? Um, WRONG! I freaked out the day before & had him try them on & they just barely squeezed on. I thought they'd work. WRONG again. The above picture is the only picture of him wearing the shoes. He took a few pictures in them, then sat down (as you see here) and started crying the second I told him he had to walk somewhere. "Mommy! My feet HURT!" What's a mom to do? No time to go out & buy new shoes, so the options became a) make him keep them on, have him screaming down the aisle at Aunties wedding, or b) take the shoes off & hope that people are looking at his happy, smiling face and not his black socks with no shoes. Yup, option b. Lesson learned.

The beautiful bride & neice.

Master & Mistress of ceremonies. This was our first time in this role, and if I do say so myself, we knocked it out of the park! :) It was super fun and I'd do it again in a heartbeat. Thank you for the honor, Jen!

And my cute little kiddos. The aforementioned borrowed tux? Yeah, it didn't even make it through dinner before the tee shirt came on & the party started!

heading to the lake

2011-07-30T08:15:00.000-07:00

After a crazy week, we're taking a vacation! We're heading out today for a week at the Conference Grounds in Grand Haven. See you in a week!

Great is Thy Faithfulness

2011-07-18T19:37:00.000-07:00

I have SO many thoughts and praises to share, but I'm not sure I have the energy to actually write them out after a week of SERVE. So, for tonight, a few quick updates will have to do:

1. MARC GOT A FULL TIME TEACHING JOB! He actually had to turn down a part time offer and accepted a full time teaching position at Western Michigan Christian. He will be teaching a few 9th grade English classes, a Freshmen seminar class, and working with the international students at the school. It's a strange combination of classes, and the international student aspect doesn't actually have a job description, so he has to essentially make that up as he goes. I cannot tell you how proud I am of my husband, and how excited I am to SEE HIM EVERY NIGHT!!!!!!! Oh goodness, I could write about this forever.

2. Hope had her CT scan last week Tuesday. She actually did not need sedation, so it was super quick and easy! AND, we got the results back on Friday, which showed everything is NORMAL! HALLELUIAH!!!!
We still have to meet with the geneticist tomorrow morning, so we'll see what happens there.

3. Quimby is on the market. Tuesday will mark 2 weeks, and we've already had 3 showings. We had 2 days of SERVE groups at the house last week to do some cleaning, painting and yard work. Can't wait to be done with that burden. So many more thoughts here, too, but no energy.

4. SERVE was an amazing week of worship and service. We had amazing leaders, amazing students and a top notch Host team and volunteers from our church. There were, of course, a few snags along the way, but overall, completely worth the energy put into it.

5. With SERVE over, it's time to focus on my sister in law, Jen's wedding on July 29th. Marc & I are master & mistress of ceremonies and I'm singing in the ceremony. We have the bachelorette party this weekend, the wedding the following weekend, and the next day we leave for a week of camping!

houses, hunting & heads

2011-07-01T12:55:00.000-07:00

Houses: This week it's been like an episode of Bob the Builder around here! Thanks to the church and DB, the parsonage has received a much needed new roof. It's not actually been nearly as loud/bad as I thought it would be, and I've now determined that I am the only light sleeper in this family. Along with the roof, there is now road construction directly outside our house. Who needs TV when you've got front end loaders, cranes, and dig-up-dirt-thingys right outside your window!

Our other house, Quimby, is now on the market again. We had a random phone call earlier this week from a girl wanting to rent it. That seemed like an amazing opportunity, seeing as how we had not even advertised anywhere. After seeking some wisdom from people we respect and trust, we decided that renting for another year was merely delaying the inevitable. So, off to the realtors we went this afternoon with a HUGE stack of paperwork that I've been working on for weeks, and it's officially for sale. Oh, did I mention the sale price is $31,100 less than what we bought it for 6 years ago? Geesh.

Our realtor is extremely ambitious, and if we don't have an offer within 2 weeks, we'll reduce the price by 5%. If another two weeks pass & no offer, another 5%. Let's get it gone!

Hunting: No, not real hunting- Job hunting. Marc had an interview in Muskegon this past week and we should know about that in 2 to 2 1/2 weeks. There is nothing else on the plate right now, which is a bit worrisome. My daily visits to certain job hunting websites are turning up much fewer & farther between opportunities that are of interest. This is a continual item for prayer.

Heads: Hope has a cat scan on July 12. That's our first step into investigating her noggin. I got all of the paperwork in to the geneticist's office today, so we're really hoping that we get an appointment sooner than our scheduled date of January 3, 2012. We're on a cancellation list, but had to have all the paperwork done beforehand.

A few updates

2011-06-21T12:18:00.000-07:00

* Our tennants at Quimby are moving at the end of this month. I'm scurrying around trying to get paperwork together to go for a short sale. I am SO done with that place. Prayers would be appreciated as we travel down this road. I'm a bit apprehensive about it, as it affects my credit and I've always had great credit. It's hard to take the plunge into this.

* Marc has a 2nd interview for a school near Houston, Texas on Thursday. PRAY!

* Hope has to go see a geneticist about the size of her head and lack of growth over the last 3 months. Glad they're investigating, but scared of what they might find.

* I'm down to 30 hours a week at work, but only 1 out of the last 4 weeks have I actually only worked 30 hours. The rest have been 40 +. Frustrating.

* Had an AMAZING trip with the high school students. I'll post about that later.

* Continuing physical therapy for my back. Not seeing tons of improvement, which is a bit frustrating, but just going to keep going. I realize it takes time. It's teaching me a bit of patience.

* Hit my goal weight today when I went to weigh in. I've lost 23lbs since 2/21. Feeling good, but still flabby. Need to get my butt in gear and build some muscle now!

Prayers for our Chicago trip

2011-06-10T20:32:00.000-07:00

Hello friends,

I'm heading to Chicago on Sunday for a week long trip with 13 high school students and one other leader. I'm wondering if you wouldn't mind praying for us? Here are a few ways you can pray:

1. Our group is a WIDE mixture of ages (14 - 19) and maturities. Please pray for group unity and bonding, despite the obvious differences. We will be learning about Christian community, so pray we can experience a bit of that.

2. WIDE mixture of spiritual depth and even openness. Please pray for lives to be touched, for hearts to be open, for new experiences of God's power and presence.

3. We are staying in a Christian community (www.jpusa.org), so pray for us as we learn from those who live out their faith in very different ways. Pray that there will be translatable concepts, and we will see commonalities - not just differences.

4. We will be serving the poor. Pray for us to again have hearts that are open and ready to serve.

5. One thing I personally have a VERY difficult time with is when students complain about work when we're on a missions trip. Please pray that I have patience and wisdom to know how to handle any difficulties that arise.

6. I'm leaving my family behind. This isn't all that hard, believe it or not. I love my family, and will miss them, but I'm completely accustomed this part of my ministry. I do worry about the little details (will Isaac go to bed well for Miss Jeni? will Hope sleep through the night for Grandma? etc), but more than anything, I'm a bit apprehensive about pumping for 8 days straight. Hope has been such a great eater, and I want to continue breastfeeding, and I'm hoping my supply does not diminish.

7. We are depending on JPUSA for all our work sites and our morning devotions. It's hard for me to not have complete control. Pray that I am flexible, and that the students are as well.

Thank you so much. If I get a chance, I may try to post an update while we're there.

Be Bold

2011-05-22T05:29:00.000-07:00

This morning, Hope woke up a bit earlier that I would've liked, but we got ourselves downstairs and situated on the couch for breakfast. I typically watch the news while I nurse in the morning, but on Sundays like to flip through the 'church' shows. It's usually to roll my eyes at the overly made-up ladies, or the way off theology I hear. This morning though, I started watching a sermon without cringing. It was biblically and theologically accurate, as far as I could tell, and they wern't asking for money. I was intrigued. The sermon was about "BIG CHURCH" and how the gospel message survived in 1st century Rome. He was talking about having boldness in sharing the gospel, and the boldness that the disciples demonstrated in Acts 5:17-42. They are brought in and flogged for spreading the word of God, and after being beaten, are told to leave and not to speak in the name of Jesus again. So what did they do?

⁴¹ The apostles left the Sanhedrin, rejoicing because they had been counted worthy of suffering disgrace for the Name. ⁴² Day after day, in the temple courts and from house to house, they never stopped teaching and proclaiming the good news that Jesus is the Messiah.

They rejoice. They are bold. They proclaim Christ.

The pastor noted how we are 1st graders when it comes to boldness. He says we rarely pray for boldness, and if our boldness has gotten us in trouble before, we change our prayer and ask for "wisdom" instead. It was a very convicting message by pastor Andy Stanley. I like to pray for wisdom. You can watch it here.

I'm reading through Joshua for my devotions. "Be strong and courageous" are words that are repeated throughout the book. Of course, in a very different context, but they are words that speak to God's omnipresence in our lives even today.

I'm going to be praying for boldness and courage. I want to share the love of Christ with MORE than just my lifestyle. Too often people rely on the good old idea of "preach the gospel, and if necessary, use words." There are so many problems with this idea! Most importantly, the Bible tells us to TEACH and PREACH the word of God! The great commission as just one example in Matthew 28:

¹⁶ Then the eleven disciples went to Galilee, to the mountain where Jesus had told them to go. ¹⁷ When they saw him, they worshiped him; but some doubted. ¹⁸ Then Jesus came to them and said, “All authority in heaven and on earth has been given to me. ¹⁹ Therefore go and make disciples of all nations, baptizing them in the name of the Father and of the Son and of the Holy Spirit, ²⁰ and teaching them to obey everything I have commanded you. And surely I am with you always, to the very end of the age.”

So, we need to use WORDS, spoken BOLDLY to share the GOSPEL.

Let's add 'boldness' to our list of things to pray for each day and see what happens. You with me?

it's thursday

2011-05-19T05:46:00.000-07:00

A few random updates:

* Marc has an interview for a high school in the DC area in the next few weeks. He's also hopefully meeting up with a principle this weekend (from CA who is in town for his son's Calvin graduation). He's applied to 2 middle schools around the W. MI area. We'll see what happens!

* May 17th was the 1 year anniversary of my due date for baby. It's amazing how much healing can take place in a year. I was a wreck last year, and got through it because of my husband and dear friends who supported me throughout the day. This year was much easier. Perhaps because I have Hope in my arms instead of belly this year, and that God has used time to bring healing. I was also distracted this year as a family member had a pretty serious surgery on that day.

* Less than 1 month til my Chicago trip! AHHHHH. I'm SO excited, but have a few details to take care of yet.

* Hope is crawling like crazy now!

* I'm down to 30 hours a week at work. Lots of thoughts there, but not enough time.

I'm off to watch GRCHS tennis regionals at the MAC. Go Molly & Taylor! :)

Ideas?

2011-05-03T20:47:00.001-07:00

So, what are you all getting your mothers for Mothers day?

Things I am looking forward to

2011-05-02T12:41:00.000-07:00

It's May! There is so much I am looking forward to this month:
* Marc's 2nd college graduation on Saturday, followed by a little open house gathering (you're all invited 7pm-10pm)
* A few team meetings for our Chicago missions trip this summer. I'm really looking forward to this trip!
* Tigers game with Oasis
* Open houses for a lot of the graduating seniors
* Reducing my hours at work. I'm a bit apprehensive about the finances of this, but the hours will be great! I feel like I'll be able to put my full focus on work and my kids more, rather than feeling constantly pulled in both directions and not feeling like I'm giving either my 100%.
* Bible Study. I'm really enjoying the book we are reading, and the group of women I am getting to know. I'm looking forward to seeing how God works in and through our group.
* Camping! We are going to the CR Conference Grounds over Memorial Day weekend. I'm SO thankful that Marc subbed several days in April, making this and the Tigers game possible. Thanks, babe! Young has never seen Lake Michigan, and he is really excited for camping too. I think it'll be a great way to end May.
* The best block sale of the year (thanks for the introduction to it, K.B.).
* Hopefully hitting my 20lb weight loss mark (1.2lbs away - this better happen in May!) and possibly my goal weight (ideally about 8lbs).
* I'm really hoping that by the end of this month we may have some clearer direction as to what next year might look like for us: moving, staying, jobs, Young, money, etc.

There is so much to be looking forward to, and thankful for!

ECObUNS SALE!

2011-04-29T07:46:00.000-07:00

My favorite cloth diaper store, Ecobuns (www.ecobuns.com) is having an open house today and tomorrow to say farewell to the store's original owners, and hello to the new owners. 10% off storewide. The sale is good online too, with the coupon code: bonvoyage.

Even if you don't cloth diaper, they have other products you might enjoy. I have a wet bag for diapers, but used it last summer for my wet bathing suits & beach towels. I want to get another one this year specifically for that purpose. They are AWESOME! :)

Monday Musings

2011-04-25T14:06:00.000-07:00

So, I still need to post a description of the little hair bows I made for Hope - tomorrow, perhaps.

For today, I just need to celebrate a few things:
* I ran 3 miles last night. My first time running since probably November.
* I reached my 10% weight loss goal today! 16.2lbs down in 9 weeks.
* 6ish pounds until I'm at my final goal weight. Perhaps a few more - we'll see how it goes.

Meatless Monday

2011-04-18T13:00:00.000-07:00

So, this isn't a 'meal', but still a great addition to a meal. Especially a holiday meal when you have a lot of people to feed. In fact, I will probably be making this on Sunday for Easter. It's more of a fall/winter side, but with the snow we got today, I think I can justify it for Easter. :)

It's a really simple hot fruit dish in a crock pot, or you can bake it in the oven for 1 hour around 350.

1 jar of chunky applesauce
1 can of pineapple tidbits
1 can of peaches (cut up)
1 can of apricots (cut up)
1 can of mandarin oranges
1 can of lite/sugar free cherry pie filling
Top with 1/2 cup brown sugar and a few teaspoons of cinnamon (to taste)

It's quite sweet with all the fruit, so you could even do without the brown sugar and people could add it on individually if they wanted to. If you get all the cans of fruit in it's natural juice it's a pretty healthy hot fruit salad! Enjoy!

Meatless Monday

2011-04-04T13:29:00.000-07:00

One of my 'go-to' meals lately is Tortilla Pizzas.

Whole wheat tortilla (2 ww pts)
1/4 cup store-bought pizza sauce (1 ww pt)
1/2 cup fat-free mozzarella cheese (2 ww pt)

I then add either some 'free' vegetables like cut up green pepper & onion, or take one of Isaac's fruit cups of pineapple (2 ww pts) and spread it over top. Put it in the oven for about 8-10 minutes, until the cheese is melted. Watch it closely, because if it gets a little to crisp it doesn't taste quite as good. This is a very quick, easy and versatile meal. Isaac thinks its a normal pizza and will eat a whole one to himself. It's great because you can make just one, or make them for the whole family and everyone can add their own toppings. Add a salad and you've got dinner! Enjoy!

Bible study

2011-03-29T20:14:00.000-07:00

I am SO excited to begin bible study with a group of ladies from my church. It's been over a year (I think?) since I was a part of this group. I took time off as I took classes at Calvin Sem, and although I'm taking a class now, it's not too much work so hopefully I can swing it. I have really missed the fellowship and community this group offers.

I'm very thankful for my dear friend who leads the group, meaning that I don't have to. It's AMAZING to be a part of something at my church that I have NO part of leading. :) I do fear that sometimes in groups like this I talk a bit too much, so I have to try and restrain myself. I need to discern the fine line between trying to get discussion going by offering a thought and dominating discussion. I just have a hard time when people don't actively participate, and leave the leader hanging, so I always jump in.

Anyhow, I'm looking forward to getting to know some new ladies, reading and discussing a thought provoking book, and spending time in prayer together.

Meatless Monday

2011-03-28T18:15:00.000-07:00

Another easy, meatless recipe.

Grands Biscuits (5 pointsplus value per biscuit) & cheese is all you need for these delicious sandwiches!

Take a biscuit & flatten it out til it's quite big. Place 2 pieces of cheese on them. Place another flattened biscuit on top. Bake according to the directions.

I made these tonight along with some V8 Tomato soup (2 points per 1 cup!) and a salad. I used reduced fat cheese to lower my weight watchers pointsplus value. You could also just use one biscuit with cheese, and not make a sandwich out of it for a lower pointsplus value. I am still stuffed & dinner was almost 4 hours ago!

More Monday Musings

2011-03-21T14:13:00.000-07:00

* Marc has Mono. At least that's what they think. He went in last week for bloodwork, BECAUSE HE THOUGHT HE MIGHT HAVE MONO, and guess what they FORGOT to test him for? Yup - MONO!!! Can you feel my frustration? Good thing I didn't go with him. So, more blood work today to confirm it, but that's the unofficial prognosis.

* I hit the 10lb weight loss mark today! 4 weeks, 10.2lbs down. Down 1.2lbs this week. Not bad this week considering I had a shamrock shake, a bowl of ice cream, and whatever those delicious cheesy, yummy triangle things are that JS makes, all in the last week. :) Amazingly I still didn't use all of my weekly points!

* Had an AMAZING youth group last night. We had between 90-100 people come for our combined youth group, and it was so exhilarating to have such a large group. It reminded me of my 'normal' size youth group at Sunshine. There are certainly pros & cons of having such a large group on a regular basis, but it was wonderful for last night, and really gave me the motivation for the rest of the year that is sometimes hard to find when you're this close to the end.

* In less than 2 weeks, Marc, Kerri & I are heading to Chicago to go hear pastor Mark Driscoll at this event. We're staying with friends of mine who are providing child care while we go, and we get to visit a few other friends who just recently had their second child. I am SO excited to get out of GR for a weekend, to have a Sunday with zero responsibilities, to relax and be filled. Working in a church is wonderful, and I love what I do, but there are certain aspects of it that can be negative at times. Church staff (and their families) don't really have a pastor. There is a dual relationship that takes place for the staff and the pastor, and it's much different than being a lay person. Also, it's hard to actually go to church to worship on a Sunday. For me, I'm constantly thinking things church related during the service, then often bombarded with church related questions after the service. It's hard to even get to my kids in nursery & Children's Worship without being stopped about 10 times. I don't mind it at all, it's just a different church experience than what I think is 'normal'. I have never been in a church that I'm not working at as an adult. I don't honestly know what it's like. There is a small part of me that is excited about that possibility if Marc & I are to move. It would be kind of fun to get to 'church shop' and find a church together, find a ministry to volunteer in, become involved in different ways, and learn how to actually 'go to church'. I would have so much fun being a volunteer youth leader! Ha! What fun that would be!

Meatless Monday

2011-03-21T11:08:00.000-07:00

One of the easiest & best recipes I make that pleases both carnivores & herbivores alike is BBQ biscuites.

You can make your own biscuits, or just simply buy some in the refrigerator section of the store. Press them into a muffin tin, so that they cover the bottom & sides and reach the top. Take some red kidney beans (drained) and coat them with BBQ sauce, and take 1/4 c. or so and place into the biscuit. Bake following the biscuit directions. A few minutes before they're done, sprinkle some shredded cheese on top, and there you have it, BBQ Biscuits.

You can also brown some hamburger & mix it with BBQ sauce to add into the cups.

Philippians 2:1-11

2011-03-16T09:47:00.000-07:00

This is the first passage of Scripture I am choosing to memorize during Lent. I've memorized it in the past, so it's actually quite familiar, but there are are a few words/phrases that I mix up. When I was in Mission Year (2001-2002), I had a goal of memorizing all of Philippians. I got bits & pieces of it down, but never quite accomplished my goal. I'm taking it on again. Not necessarily with a time frame in mind, however.

Are you going anything for Lent?

Monday Musings

2011-03-14T16:19:00.000-07:00

Haven't updated in a while, so here are a few bullet point updates to life at the Driesengas!

* 3 weeks of WW and I'm down 9lbs. Feeling good!

* Marc has been sick for a week. He's exhausted still, although feeling better besides that. I made him go to urgent care today, because I'm fearing it could be mono or something. In almost 6 years of marriage I have never seen him so tired. Strange considering his work/school schedule for the past 5 years. Something's not right. He'll get results of his blood work back on Wednesday.

* So far application have been sent to Missouri, Florida, & Hudsonville. In process are more Florida, Georgia and Pennsylvania. Hopefully Marc can get some energy back to work on them!

* Hope is 6 months tomorrow! We have her doc appointment and I'm anxious to see how much she's grown!

* I'm SO excited about youth group this Sunday. We've invited a few other churches to join us and we have Dr. Ron Nydam from Calvin Seminary coming to speak on "Romantic Radar". It's going to be great.

* My son is obsessed with the Black Eyed Peas. aye.

* Trying to live in peace through this transitional time in life. I want to go through this well, trusting in the Lord to lead us.

* Lent: not giving up anything, but trying to memorize a passage of Scripture each week. If you get the Banner, I really enjoyed this article in there about Lent. I'll post more on this later.

Workin' the WW

2011-03-04T16:07:00.000-08:00

I'm officially on board with Weight Watchers. Hope is almost 6 months old, and I've got a bit of baby weight I just can't seem to shake. I'm in the middle of my second week and it's going great so far. My first week I was down 4.8lbs! I know I won't always have big weeks like that, but what a motivating way to start. I truly appreciate how WW is something you can maintain throughout your lifetime, it's not just a fad diet. I'm eating healthier foods, healthier portions and feeling more energy already.

Waiting

2011-02-23T20:01:00.000-08:00

So many of my friends are in very dark places right now. Many are hurting, broken, confused and some even angry. Some of my friends are in joyful periods of anticipation.

They are all left waiting. Waiting on the Lord. Waiting on some sort of peace or understanding. Waiting for answers.

It's hard to walk along side friends who are waiting when you yourself have no answers. All you can do is listen, offer a shoulder to cry on, pray, encourage, and when it's appropriate maybe offer a little humor. Sometimes it doesn't seem like enough.

For my friends who are waiting for test results, waiting for babies, waiting for a spouse, waiting for a job, waiting on answers of why a baby was taken before his time, waiting on answers of why the twins were taken at 22 weeks, waiting for peace about a break up, waiting for the right job to come along, waiting...

I wait with you.

I pray for you.

I love you.

Psalm 27

Of David.

¹ The LORD is my light and my salvation—
whom shall I fear?
The LORD is the stronghold of my life—
of whom shall I be afraid?

² When the wicked advance against me
   to devour^[a] me,
it is my enemies and my foes
   who will stumble and fall.
³ Though an army besiege me,
   my heart will not fear;
though war break out against me,
   even then I will be confident.

⁴ One thing I ask from the LORD,
   this only do I seek:
that I may dwell in the house of the LORD
   all the days of my life,
to gaze on the beauty of the LORD
   and to seek him in his temple.
⁵ For in the day of trouble
   he will keep me safe in his dwelling;
he will hide me in the shelter of his sacred tent
   and set me high upon a rock.

⁶ Then my head will be exalted
above the enemies who surround me;
at his sacred tent I will sacrifice with shouts of joy;
I will sing and make music to the LORD.

⁷ Hear my voice when I call, LORD;
   be merciful to me and answer me.
⁸ My heart says of you, “Seek his face!”
   Your face, LORD, I will seek.
⁹ Do not hide your face from me,
   do not turn your servant away in anger;
   you have been my helper.
Do not reject me or forsake me,
   God my Savior.
¹⁰ Though my father and mother forsake me,
   the LORD will receive me.
¹¹ Teach me your way, LORD;
   lead me in a straight path
   because of my oppressors.
¹² Do not turn me over to the desire of my foes,
   for false witnesses rise up against me,
   spouting malicious accusations.

¹³ I remain confident of this:
   I will see the goodness of the LORD
   in the land of the living.
¹⁴ Wait for the LORD;
   be strong and take heart
   and wait for the LORD.

Spiritual Poverty

2011-02-20T13:49:00.000-08:00

"The trouble is that, as modern people, we have too much to live with and too little to live for. Some feel they have time but not enough money; others feel they have money but not enough time. But for most of us, in the midst of material plenty, we have spiritual poverty."

Os Guinness, The Call

Snow Day Snippets!!

2011-02-02T15:22:00.000-08:00

* Not only did Young get a snow day, Marc got a snow day from work tonight! How awesome to have an unexpected night with my whole family home! What a rare blessing that is.

* I went out with Isaac today. We sat in the snow, dug for treasure, watched the truck & tractor clear the snow from the church parking lot and took a walk. While Isaac wasn't about to lay in the snow, I went all out and even made a snow angel!

* My little boy wanted to cuddle with me this afternoon. I love that.

* I tried out my new long underwear for the trek outdoors. I might wear it under everything all winter long from here on out. Just you watch.

* Isaac & Hope did NOT get the memo about sleeping in on snow days. Someone needs to train these kids.

* Sending lots of emails about an awesome Wednesday night church night coming up at PH on February 16, and the high school winter retreat coming up this weekend. There is so much to look forward to in the next few months at church. God has truly aligned the hearts of many of my friends with a similar vision for PH and we're making things happen! It's an exciting time.

* Started my Calvin Seminary class yesterday and excited to start a little snow day reading tonight on one of my books. My class is "Fostering Intergenerational Communities". I certainly consider it more than mere coincidence that I'm taking this class while my previous point about church stuff is happening.

* I finally changed my Christmas background. Yeah, it's an Easter one. I spent more time reflecting on Advent this year (thanks for the devotional, KB), and it made it much more meaningful. I'd like to spend more energy focusing on Easter and Lent this year, so I'm really excited about the Easter background!

3 more months!

2011-01-28T13:30:00.001-08:00

We have renters for the next 3 months! They've signed another lease through the end of May. Whew. One less worry for the present time. Thanks for those who have prayed for us as we waited and wondered!

Quimby update

2011-01-24T21:22:00.000-08:00

We have had renters in our Quimby street house since the end of last May. It has gone well so far...as far as I know. I've been probably too detached from the house and my role as a landlord. This is made easy by the fact that our tenants never call us with questions or complaints. They pay their rent on time and that's all we hear from them all month.

I can't drive down Plainfield without getting anxious. In fact, when I drive on 131 past the exit to get to Quimby, I become anxious. I've been functioning with the 'out of sight, out of mind' mentality which I know isn't healthy, but it's kept me sane.

I'm meeting with my tenants on Friday afternoon to discuss if they will continue a lease or not. I'm anxious. Please pray for God's guidance for us and them as we figure things out. Please pray for my anxiety about all this, and that I will truly "Trust in the Lord with all of my heart, and lean not on my own understanding."

What a Pain!

2011-01-18T14:08:00.000-08:00

Ever since college I have experienced back pain on & off. It will worsen for a few weeks up to a few months, then get much better. I've never bothered to get it looked at, as I could always think of a reason it might be hurting and my pain became 'normal'. Well it got much worse while I was pregnant, and I thought after delivering it would be better again. Wrong. So, I finally went to the doc a few weeks ago & have started physical therapy. Today, I had to perform some very simple tasks: balancing on one foot on a mini-tramp while moving a ball over my head with my hands, arm presses while on the balance ball, turning over while laying on a table. I couldn't do them. I could barely balance on one foot, and certainly couldn't lift a ball over my head. I was struggling through the arm presses, and I winced in pain turning over. I've got a long road ahead of me, folks!

I think I've been avoiding working out because I want to jump right back into where I was just over a year ago - running 5 miles, swimming for hours, biking miles on end - and I can't. I can barely balance, for pete's sake! I've got degenerative disc disease, or something like it. She's still trying to figure it out. Apparently, I also have a 'block' when I try to bend to the right (which is why bowling became so painful on Saturday!), which I have to work out as well. My pubic bone is also not quite aligned. So, I'm doing my exercises 4 times a week and PT once a week for who knows how long. I'm really hoping to see some improvement. Pain has become normal, and I'd like to see what life is like without it!

I am so thankful for Physical Therapists and doctors who can help determine what needs to be done, and then treat me!

I had missionaries come speak to youth group on Sunday night, and one of the questions a student asked was about medical care. The closest place to get decent care is hours and hours away from them. And they have a 2 year old son and one on the way. It really reminded me how much they have to trust God for ALL things, including their bodies and health. I am thanking God this week for missionaries everywhere who make such sacrifices to spread the Word of God.

4 Months and 3 Years

2011-01-17T13:43:00.000-08:00

My little man is 3!! We celebrated last week for 3 days straight! We started out on Thursday (his actual bday) by going out to lunch as a family to Red Robin. He got a free sundae & a balloon. We could have stopped the celebration then and he would've been fine! Friday we had a few church friends over for a playdate, and Saturday we had our family over for more celebrations. We had a great time with all our friends and family, and our child was certainly spoiled.

At the doc, Isaac is still measuring at 97% for his age. 40 1/2 inches tall! He's around 90% for weight and is doing well in every way possible!

2 Years Old

3 Years Old

1 Month Old

My little girl is 4 Months old! She was 26 inches long (97%), around 80% for weight. Her head size is quite large (97%), and we're keeping an eye on it to make sure it's not anything to worry about, but for now the doc has calmed my fears and told me he thinks she's just got a large head. Apparently my grandpa who died before I was born also had a large forehead. As long as she's healthy we are happy! She has now rolled over several times and is doing great!

2 Months Old

4 Months Old

Captured In Clay

2011-01-16T11:45:00.000-08:00

When Isaac was 5 weeks old, my good friend brought us to a woman's house in Ada to get his footprints and hand-prints in clay. It was such a thoughtful gift and we have loved having this keepsake!

So when Hope was around 4 weeks old, I called here to make an appointment so we could get one made for her.

She was actually going to be out at a consignment shop in Ada, so the next weekend, we headed out there.

She has different size tiles, colors, fonts, stamps, beads and ideas. We chose the same size and fonts as Isaac, but got to add a girly color and stamps.

It takes less than 5 minutes to actually get the prints taken, and she does the hard work of actually making the impression.

A few weeks later we got to pick up the final product. I was very pleased with how it came out!

New Years Resolutions?

2011-01-11T20:50:00.000-08:00

Anyone have any?

My specific goals are to:
1. Run a 10k
2. Lose 20lbs

My difficult-to-actually-measure goals are:
1. To live with no excuses. I think "No excuses" is my theme for this year. From little things, like neglecting to unload the dishwasher, to more important things like time with my family - no excuses. I don't want to settle for less than what God has in store for me, and I think I do that by procrastinating, being lazy, or making excuses.
2. Follow my husband. Obviously, we will be following God first and foremost, but it's time for me to follow my husband and allow him to use the gifts he has and is now certified to use!

Love. Love. Love.

2011-01-06T21:17:00.000-08:00

Trying to Trust

2011-01-04T18:54:00.000-08:00

I've realized how lousy I can be at trusting God. I am such a planner, a list maker, and an almost obsessive trying-to-figure-everything-outer, that being in a position with so many unanswered questions about our future is tough.

To prove my extreme planning nature: There are two positions open at a high school in St. Louis, MO. I've gone on the schools website probably 50 times. I've looked up the location on mapquest numerous times. I've looked up apartments/houses for rent to see what you get for your money. I've looked up the local seminary (which Marc and I would both LOVE to attend) to see if my classes would transfer. I've looked up parks nearby. I've got us packed & moved already, and Marc hasn't even applied yet!

And before you lecture me, yes, I know this is not a healthy behavior. Yes, I know the job market is tough and the likelihood of Marc getting the first job he applies for is not high. Yes, I know there is a chance he might not find a full time teaching job, or even a job at all. Yes, I know I'm romanticizing moving and starting over.

But how do I stop? I need to learn to trust God's plan rather than create my own. Easier said than done. I need to trust that God is Sovereign and in control of our lives and our family. Trust that he knows our future and where we will be. Trust that he will figure out our finances. Trust that he will provide what we need when we need it.

I feel like an Israelite.

How many times did God provide for them, lead them, prove his faithfulness to them, and yet time after time they created idols to worship, doubted, complained and stopped trusting.

God has certainly proved himself faithful. Now if only I can prove that I can surrender and trust him.

Routine? What's that?

2011-01-03T09:01:00.000-08:00

Next week starts our true family routine. We've never had one before. Never. I guess we've had semi-schedules, but with 3 different people watching the kids weekly at different times, Marc's class schedule changing every semester, my youth group events new each semester and a kid who went from napping to not napping, I'm not sure we can legitimately call it a schedule.

I'm a pretty laid back person. I like to go with the flow, and I really enjoy flexibility. HOWEVER, I have learned that I function MUCH better in a routine. My Mission Year days taught me that. I thrived that year. But I had 4 other adults living with me to keep me to it. I'm not so sure Isaac is going to be my best accountability when it comes to less TV and an earlier bedtime. I know it's good for me, and really good for our family to be in a routine, it's just tricky to start, especially when I value sleep more than, well, just about anything.

So, this week is a practice week. Marc is teaching a J term class at Northpointe each day, so we can't truly get into our schedule until he's done. I started this morning by getting up on time & getting ready, bringing Young to school, waking up the kids (waking them up hoping that = going to bed earlier), feeding Hope, going to the post office & heading to the office all by a little after 9am. I'm hoping to get the kids on a better schedule, giving me more time to sleep and hopefully I can wake up even earlier to get a work out in. I'd also love to do my devotions in the morning instead of at night, but one thing at a time.

Any tips for creating & sticking to a family routine? What's your routine?

The end of a chapter

2010-12-16T21:01:00.000-08:00

How do I even start to write reflectively on the last 5 years of school now that Marc is a day away from being done? There is way too much. I think I'll focus on the highlights of God's faithfulness to us through this journey, because in the end, it's all about Him. Without Him we would not be experiencing the joy that tomorrow will bring us.

* Marc and I got married on 8/5/05 and almost immediately decided that Marc should go back to school. We may have been slightly idealistic as we set out on this endeavor. We didn't know how to pay for it, how long it would take, the ups and downs we would go through, or even what Marc would study! We just knew that being obedient to God's voice in our lives meant Marc going back. So with no job lined up, he quit his job at Lowe's because it would not work around his school schedule. He started January 2006 at Kuyper College. We trusted and God was faithful.

* He almost immediately found a part time job, and a month later took a full time 2nd shift job. Jehovah-Jireh - Our Lord Will Provide.

* We had a few problems figuring out financial aid/loans. The week before the end of the semester, Marc got a letter saying that he couldn't take exams if we hadn't paid for the semester (which we hadn't paid a dime yet!). Within a day or two, we got word that the loans had finally gone through, and the semester was paid for. God provided. Jehovah - Jireh!

* We decided to start a family. Isaac was born in January 2008. Now, he is an absolute joy, but having him presented us with a small hurdle. Who would take care of our son while I worked and Marc went to class? My parents, Marc's mom and my sister have been watching Isaac (and now Hope) faithfully every week since I went back to work. Words seriously cannot express my gratitude to them. Other family members and dear friends have also watched them as I have had events with church and other things come up. Without any of them, we would not have made it. Our God is faithful.

* Marc couldn't get any loans last year or this year. We have kinda tapped out our available funds with loans. And we had/have no extra money to spare. There was a period where we thought that after 3 1/2 years, he might not be able to finish. Then my parents offered to help us out with a loan. 1st semester covered. Then our tax return was bigger than expected. 2nd semester covered. Then we couldn't pay rent. $500 was randomly left on our garage door to help with some of it. God provided. Again. Jehovah - Jireh

* Last fall we felt overwhelmed with our schedules. We prayed and felt sure Marc was supposed to go part-time to school for that semester. God knew we would need that extra time to deal with Quimby and to grieve after our miscarriage. Our God holds our future. Our Lord is our comforter.

* This fall, we had no way to pay for school (again). Marc met with the finance person at Cornerstone and they agreed to allow us a grace period to pay for the semester and to pay it after we got our taxes back in 2011. Seriously? What University does that? Our God provided. Again. Again.

* Marc has had a fantastic cooperating teacher at an amazing school. He has loved his experience at Northpointe and would love to actually teach there if an opportunity ever arose. The school you are placed at and teacher you are put with can make or break your student teaching experience. Both have been better than we could have imagined. El-Roi. Our God who Sees.

* There's nothing like having a baby the first full week of student teaching! While we LOVE our son, he was an extremely difficult baby. We were kind of gearing up for the same experience with Hope. We were surprised when she actually slept at night and was a happy, content baby during the day. She started sleeping through the night between 2 & 3 weeks and by about 4-5 weeks was sleeping 10 hours a night. If we had another baby like Isaac, this semester would have been incredibly trying. Hope is such a peaceful and happy baby. Jehovah - Shalom. Our Lord is peace. Our Lord gave us peace.

* There have been times that Marc has been stretched beyond belief. Working full time (or more) plus going to school either part time or full time for 5 years is incredibly demanding. Marc has given up a LOT of sleep over the last 5 years. He's given up hobbies, free time, leisurely reading, time with friends, running/training like he would like to, and probably more time with us than he would like. He has rarely complained. Seriously. I can think of maybe a handful of times. That's it. I have been blessed with a husband who is determined, passionate about his calling and won't give up. Elohim. Our God is strong and mighty, and gives us strength when we need it.

* Other random things in the mix of the last 5 years includes me switching jobs, moving, becoming landlords, my dad having a heart attack, Marc having kidney stones, hosting exchange students, friends and other family helping us with money for Quimby, friends helping us demolish and rebuild the kitchen at Quimby, random gifts of clothes for Isaac left on our porch, the grace of our church with prayers and help with rent, free babysitters from a few of my youth group girls, being accepted to teach English in China and having to decide not to go, a free bed from a friend, a youth group student dying, Marc working at several different jobs, totaling a car & transmission dying in a car within a few months of eachother,and now, potty training. :)

And now we are on the brink of closing this chapter. We have been incredibly blessed throughout this journey. While it has been tremendously difficult in so many ways, it has also been rewarding. It has taught us to trust God and be obedient when it seems almost foolish, how to rely on others and ask for help, how to lower our pride to accept help, the value of education and following God's call for vocation, and utter reliance on our Savior to pull it all together and make it happen.

I wish I could repay all our family, friends and church who have supported us on this journey. A simple "thank you" just does not seem sufficient. This is a celebration for us all, and we truly would not be at this place in our lives without you all. Thank you. Thank you. Thank you. I love you all.

And finally, I am SO PROUD OF MY HUSBAND! I'm not sure how he has done it all. He is going to be an amazing teacher, of that I am certain. I am blessed with a godly man who follows God's direction for our family. I love you, Marc.

So, how can you read all that and not believe in God's sovereign plan, his providence, his love and his faithfulness? He is good.

Baby Pictures

2010-12-08T21:26:00.000-08:00

Monday Morning Musings

2010-12-06T09:31:00.000-08:00

Communion. Our high school Sunday school class (Inklings) visited COS yesterday. We've been talking about liturgy in worship and have visited a few other churches to see how liturgy is done there. Communion was done very differently there. I enjoyed it. Rather than the plates being passed, you exit your row and join a circle up front of maybe 50 or more and pass the elements to one another while saying "the body of Christ, broken for you" and "the blood of Christ, poured out for you". You pass a loaf of bread & rip off a hunk, then dip it into the cup of juice or wine. There is something very earthy about the experience of using your hands more in this sensory experience that Christ laid our for us. It is almost too polished and pretty taking pre-cut squares of bread and pre-poured plastic cups of juice. This way was a new experience for most of my students. The student who passed it to me asked, "what am I supposed to say??". He was a bit nervous but I think relieved that he had to pass to me and not a stranger. Anyhow, I watched one man a few people over from me rip off a HUGE hunk of bread. My first thought was that perhaps he was getting a bit hungry & needed a little snack. Perhaps he was internally longing for Christ and took off as much as he could. Maybe that's just how much came off when he pulled from the loaf. Is there an 'approved' amount you should take? It just made me take notice when I saw it.

Potty Training. It's been 11 days. We're still having more accidents than successes. For some reason he does better for me than other people. Every time he's had a sitter, he's had an accident. It makes me feel bad that others have to deal with it, and makes me feel slightly guilty that I have to work and can't do it all myself.

Marc. We have been married for 5 years and 4 months. 5 years of that has included Marc working full time and going to school at least part time, if not full time. And in 2 weeks he will be done. HOLY MOLY! Sure, there is a lot for him to do in the next few weeks, but the end is so close I can practically taste it. It's a tad bittersweet as Marc has truly enjoyed his experience at Northpointe and is doing something to use his gifts, knowledge and training. When he's done, he goes back to his 50-60 hour a week job running a machine. I wish he could jump right into a teaching position. I know Northpointe already has him on their sub list, so hopefully that will offer him a bit of satisfaction until we find a full time position.

Transition. I feel like I'm graduating along with Marc. We are entering the phase of looking at next fall and wondering where we will be, where we will be working, if I'll be working, where we'll be living, where Isaac might go to preschool...so many questions and zero answers. It's a bit exciting, but scary at the same time. This is truly forcing me to trust God more and more. I'm such a planner and find myself in a place where I can't. I've been praying for God to prepare us and our families for moving. It has just recently occurred to me that God might keep us here. If he does, I'm going to need him to mentally prepare me for that. I'm expecting a ton of transition, and to be honest, there might not be much. Marc might find a job around here. We might still live here & I might still work at PH. It'll be interesting to see what the next few months holds for us!

11 week stats

2010-11-30T14:15:00.000-08:00

We wondered if Hope would be big like her brother. The girl has not disappointed!

Hope is 24 3/4 inches - above 97%

12lbs 3.5oz - just over 75%

Way to go, girl!

Potty Training - Day 4

2010-11-29T16:53:00.001-08:00

Many successes today & only 1 accident! He's really catching on to this! He's still not telling me when he needs to go, but he's able to hold it until we sit him on the potty. Small steps!

Can we fast forward?

2010-11-28T11:12:00.000-08:00

Day 3 of potty training. I need to go out & buy more underwear for Ike. Apparently 12 pair are not nearly enough for potty training. He's doing okay, but I'd like to skip ahead to a few weeks from now when we're through the battles and numerous accidents.

I'm not sure Isaac actually is able to tell when he needs to use the potty. That's our struggle right now. I'm not sure how to help him listen to his body, except by allowing lots and lots of accidents to happen and having him realize how disgusting being in wet pants is!

We've got a chart set up on the refridgerator where he gets a star for 1. telling an adult 2. using the potty 3. using toilet paper 4. flushing the toilet and 5. washing his hands. When he gets 5 stars, he gets a matchbox car out of a box. Don't tell Isaac that many of these cars he's already played with & has just forgotten about! :) We do have a few in there passed down from a friend, but most of them are his already.

He has been improving slightly and it's encouraging to see some small steps in the right direction. We'll see how today goes...so far 1 accident and 0 successes.

So, any tips on potty training a boy? Any advice? Any encouragement?

Sale at EcoBuns!

2010-11-12T13:19:00.000-08:00

If you're someone who is interested in trying out cloth, there is a 15% off sale at EcoBuns in Holland on Tuesday, November 23 and Wednesday, November 24.

Even if you're not a cloth diaper person, they have all kinds of other baby items - baby carriers, wet bags (which are GREAT for the summer months with wet towels & bathing suits), mommy necklaces, babylegs, etc. I'm planning to make a trip out, so let me know if you want to join me!

Cloth DIapering 101

2010-11-10T14:41:00.000-08:00

When I was pregnant with Isaac, cloth diapering was not something I gave a split second thought to. My sister in law had a baby just over a year after Isaac was born & she started using cloth. The diapers she had didn't seem anything like what I imagined. I was thinking all cloth diapers were the prefolds that you had to use pins on & then cover with rubber pants...

I never thought of switching Isaac over, but when I got pregnant again, I thought I'd investigate. I went to Hop Scotch Children's Store on a Saturday for a cloth diapering 'class'. They show you the variety of cloth diapers out there, talk about the pros and cons, answer questions, etc. I was convinced after going that this was for me!

So, Hope is now full time in cloth diapers, and I'm loving it! We use Bum Genius and FuzziBunz pocket diapers. They have a pocket in them to stuff an insert or prefold diaper into.

So, I have a few friends considering cloth, so here's a bit of our routine:

When we change a dirty diaper (#1 and/or #2), we pull out the insert and throw both parts into a wet bag. Right now, as Hope is exclusively breast-fed, there is no need to clean off the diapers before washing them. When we start introducing solids, we will have to rinse the diapers before washing. It shouldn't be too bad now that I bought a diaper sprayer!

Planet Wise Wet Bag

It's essentially like a kitchen sink sprayer that you attach to the toilet. Then, when you have a dirty diaper, you hold it over the toilet & spray everything off. No need to scrap it off, or dip the diaper into the toilet!

We've got about 30 diapers right now, so I truly only have to wash them 2 times per week. When the bag is full, I wash them.

My wash cycle consists of: 1 cold rinse, 1 hot wash with 1/2 the amount of Tide Original powder, 1 cold rinse.

Then we line dry the shells and throw the inserts into the dryer. When they're all dry, I sit in front of the TV and stuff all the inserts into the diapers so they're ready to go when we need them. I store them in a few baskets & on the back of her door:

So far, the negatives of cloth diapering are:
* we've had a few leaks as I've been figuring out how tight to snap or velcro the diapers, and the BG diapers have an infant insert and a regular size insert. We realized quickly that the infant inserts don't hold a lot, so we've already moved up to the regluar ones.
* they are a big bulkier than disposables. Hope seems a big more stiff around the waist as they don't offer as much flexibility right now. I think as she gets bigger, this will be better.
* a bit more work than just throwing away a disposable, but I haven't honestly minded.
* they don't hold as much, so we have to change her diaper more often.

So far, the positives of cloth diapering are:
* knowing that there are no chemicals on my little girls bottom (read here to learn about the chemicals in disposables)
* knowing that we're not putting additional waste into landfills
* savings! I realize our utility costs may go up with our wash cycles, but overall, we'll still be saving money by cloth diapering. I estimate that we spend about $50 a month on diapers for Isaac. Assuming he'll be potty trained by age 3 (please!), that means that diapering him from birth - potty training will be around $1,800.
I spent about $350 on around 30 diapers, a diaper sprayer, 2 large wet bags, 2 small wet bags (for the diaper bag), and about 20 reusable wipes. So before considering utilities, I'd save $1,450. And that's for 1 child. If we use these for multiple children, the savings goes up, up, UP!

Overall, I'm very happy with our decision (and I think Marc is too!) and I'm excited to buy a few more diapers with cute patterns. :) I HIGHLY recommend cloth diapering. It's not nearly as much work as you might think and darnit, if my kid isn't cute in her little diaper!

Feel free to post any questions you may have, and I'll try to answer them!

Goals

2010-11-09T07:12:00.000-08:00

In doing this Biggest Loser Challenge, I have decided on a few goals and I thought I'd post them as a sort of online accountability. So, here they are:

Long-term goals:
Lose 20lbs by March 1st
Run a 5k on New Years Eve
Run a 10k in spring/summer

Short term goals this month:
Lose 5lbs by December 1
Be able to run 2 miles by December 1
Start eating more fruits and vegetables

Attempt at Craftiness

2010-10-28T13:33:00.000-07:00

Our church has a craft night - maybe monthly? I don't even know how often. Anyhow, I've always been tempted to go, but I typically have had things going on those nights, or my fear of being the only one under 50 has held me back. This month, however, the lure of making a 'fall wreath' conquered that fear, and I ventured all the way across the parking lot for my first official "Craft Night". There were mostly incredibly fake looking leaves available to add to the wreath, so I went with all the more 'natural' things, like pine cones and cattails. It's not exactly what I was dreaming of, but for my first attempt at being crafty since Calvinettes, not too bad.

Growing like a weed

2010-10-24T21:19:00.000-07:00


Not even 48 hours old

5 weeks 5 days

She's grown! Not sure if you can see it in the pictures, but after holding her in church for over an hour, I can certainly feel it!

10/22/10

2010-10-23T20:09:00.000-07:00

One year since my miscarriage. I thought about it a few times, but more than that, I tried to not think about it. My due date of May 17 was much more difficult than I expected, but this day went by without much thought. It's amazing how much has happened in that year, and how I have continued to see and experience God's faithfulness despite some trying situations. Last year at this time, we were grieving and dealing with a trashed rental house. Those two situations caused months and months of time, tears, sweat, money, humility, health, gratitude, and loss of sanity. This year we are celebrating Hope, Marc is 1/2 way done with student teaching and a mere 7-8 weeks away from being DONE with school!! WOW!

Found!

2010-10-23T08:27:00.000-07:00

The private investigator has tracked Betsie to Arizona. She is safe, healthy and said she did not want to be found. The family is still trying to figure out what she's doing there, who she's with, etc, so her and her family could still use everyones prayers.

I am so grateful that this has a 'happy' ending to some extent. It could have been so much worse.

Missing

2010-10-21T10:08:00.000-07:00

This is Betsie Kruse. She has been missing since 10/11/10. She willingly left her home (off 4 mile rd) at 5am in a white car/taxi and has not been home since. The police called her cell phone & someone called back saying it was her and saying she was okay, so the police have closed the case. BUT she has not been home or been found yet! She is 19, wheel-chair bound and needs her medication which she does not have with her. Her family has hired a private investigator and he has asked people to spread the word about Betsie, since the police and media are not covering this. Her parents are speculating an online predator might have her, but of course, they don't know anything for sure. She is a member at Sunshine church and a former youth group student of mine. Please, spread the word and pray that Betsie is safe and comes home.

For the Mommas out there!

2010-10-18T11:17:00.000-07:00

I just entered a giveaway for an Ergo baby carrier on this blog.You should all check it out! Not only for the giveaway, but the other posts here as well! Just reading this woman's about me' section of her blog made me like her! :)

If I don't win one here, I'm asking for gift cards to EcoBuns for my birthday and Christmas so I can get one.

I have a baby bjorn which I used a bit with Isaac, but it hurt my shoulders and I just never fell in love with it. I have a maya wrap sling, but I never felt Isaac was very secure in it, and it also hurt my shoulders. I have a moby wrap now, which my sister gave me and I really like that. It does take a bit to get Hope in and out of it, but it gets easier each time I use it. But what I really want is a Ergo - I have heard amazing things about it from everyone I know who has one. And every time I see a babywearing mama in public and I think "that looks like a great baby carrier" it's always an Ergo. So, there's my plug. Hopefully I will win one and can post a review after using it! :)

Biggest Loser

2010-10-18T10:43:00.000-07:00

My biggest loser challenge starts on Saturday! I'm really looking forward to facilitating this for this great group of women!

If you're interested, check out www.grbigloser.blogspot.com - I'm going to update it with recipes, tips on healthy living, links to great articles, etc. It's more than just for those in the challenge. I'll add it to my blogroll on the side of this blog so you can easily access it if you are interested!

10/15/10 - One Month Old!!

2010-10-15T14:55:00.000-07:00

My little Hope Anneliese is one month old today! Each month I'm going to take a picture with her adorable white teddy bear (Thanks K.B.) to see how much she's grown.

We went to weigh her in today at the doc,and she's gained 11oz in the last 10 days, which is perfect. She is up to 9lbs 5oz - still 5oz smaller than when Isaac was born! She's eating like a champ now, and still sleeping really well. She had to have her belly button cauterized with silver nitrate today, which I wasn't expecting. Her little cord fell off at 2 weeks, but since then has still been a bit, well, gross. The doc said the healing had 'gone wild' and she will need another 2 treatments, most likely. So, we will go back on Tuesday and see how it's doing.

She's smiling already and starting to 'coo' and talk a bit - it's so cute. I love my little girl!!!

My little pumpkin

2010-10-14T20:06:00.000-07:00

Biggest Loser Challenge

2010-10-13T08:41:00.001-07:00

So last year around this time, I did a biggest loser challenge online with a bunch of women I didn't know. I got 2nd place :(, but it was very helpful to have some accountability and something to motivate me towards healthy living/eating.

So, I decided to start my own challenge. Here are the details. Let me know if you're interested (excluding probably most of my blog readers who are all currently pregnant! :) )
and feel free to invite your friends too! You can let people know to email me at gretchendriesenga@gmail.com if they want to join. We won't start until October 23, so that gives us over a week to recruit some more people! Feel free to post the challenge as your status, or email friends or word of mouth. People don't need to be local to GR to participate.

Biggest Loser
October 23-December 23

Each participant will pay $10 to join. The winner of the challenge will collect 75% of the pot, 2nd place will get 15% of the pot, 3rd place will get 10% of the pot. So, obviously the more people we get involved, the bigger the pot will be.

We will weigh in and record our progress every Saturday, starting on October 23 with our starting weight. If you fail to weigh in by Saturday midnight, you will owe another $1 to the pot. If you gain during the week, you will owe $1 for each pound gained (due at the end of the challenge).

I’m planning to start a blog dedicated to this challenge, so you can email me your weekly weigh in or comment on the blog. Your starting weight will not be posted, just if you gained/lost each week. The winners will be determined by overall percentage of weight loss, not merely who lost the most pounds.

I will also post articles/inspiring ideas/exercise routines/healthy recipes, etc to the blog as a way to encourage everyone & would welcome any links to things you find helpful in our journey towards health!

Just think - even if we merely do the 1-2lbs weight loss per week that is recommended, that would be anywhere from 8-16lbs by Christmas time! How exciting would it be to buy a size smaller clothes with our Christmas gift cards! :)

my sleeping beauty

2010-10-11T06:34:00.000-07:00

Hope is an incredible sleeper. She is already mostly going through the night - at least 6-7 hours each night, and sometimes even more! I feel so incredibly blessed by that, especially since I will be starting back to work this week (part time). I'm feeling good about starting up work again. I miss the students and leaders, and I miss the work! I'm looking forward to easing in part time though, and think going back to 40+ hours a week will be tough, but I've done it before & can do it again!

Funny sidenote: I am sitting on the couch drinking coffee while typing, and I just tried to rest my coffee cup on my belly like I did when I was pregnant. Didn't work so well!

Another funny sidenote: Did anyone else notice something funny in the pic of Isaac & Hope? Look at Isaacs head - the little tiara in the background looks like it's on his head!

Quick update

2010-10-09T18:54:00.000-07:00

* Isaac has gone to bed 3 nights without his nuk now. It actually makes me a little sad, because it's one more step of him becoming a 'big boy' instead of my little boy. :(

* Hope weighed in on Tuesday at 8lbs 10oz. Still not back up to birth weight, but she had gained 3 oz in 5 days so the doc was pleased. We have to do another weigh in next week to make sure she's continuing to gain, but she's on the right track.

* I know at least 1 person due with a baby every month through June 2011 with the exception of May. Wow - lots of babies coming. Some of them are people I have been praying for continually as they have experienced a loss or have not been able to conceive. I continue to pray for those who are waiting on the Lord in this area. As my miscarriage date rolls around (10/22), I know it will again be a reminder of many who have experienced this type of heartache and of the blessing a healthy pregnancy and baby really are.

* Marc is really enjoying student teaching at Northpointe. 2 more months folks. 2 more months.

* I start back at work on Wednesday (part time). Has it really been 4 weeks already? Wowza!!

Clara Catherine Pluister Zuidema

2010-10-07T14:10:00.000-07:00

My dear grandmother, Clara Zuidema, passed away on Sunday, September 26. She was 95 years old and completely ready to meet her Lord and Savior.

Maybe a week or so before she died, she went into the hospital with pneumonia, which is never good, but especially when you're 95 years old. She was doing okay for a few days - still eating and getting up to walk around a bit. As the week went on, she became weaker and lost some of the spunk she was known for.

I called her on Saturday to tell her she needed to get better so that she could meet Hope. She said, "I don't know, honey, I'm in the Lords hands now". I could tell she didn't want to fight. She was tired. She was ready.

Our family went down on Sunday to see her, thinking it could be only a matter of weeks until she died, not really thinking it would be that day. On our way down, my Aunt called to tell us that she was pretty much waiting for us to get there and then they would be just making her comfortable until the end.

When we got up to her room, I went over to hug and kiss her and she almost immediately asked "Where's your baby?" I brought Hope in and we got to snap a few pictures. It was hard to understand what she was trying to tell us with the big mask on, and she was getting really frustrated. After we had some time with her, the nurses came in to take off the mask and give her some morphine - we realized it would be only a matter of hours. We were all looking forward to the mask coming off so she could finally say whatever she had been trying to tell us. At one point, she was even trying to spell something, which we still couldn't make out. Anyhow, the nurse came in and gave her morphine, which immediately knocked her out. She never woke up.

She lasted about 2 hours before taking her last breath. We sang "It is Well" as she lay with her breathing steadily slowing down. We held her hand. We talked about her life. We cried.

I am so thankful that we got to say goodbye, that she got to meet Hope and that she died very peacefully. She was a woman of faith, and while I wish I had more time with her while she was alive, I know she is in heaven with our Lord.

Day 30

2010-09-25T08:27:00.000-07:00

Day 30
Pray that your husband will serve God and others with pure motives. Pray that he will obey the
Lord from his heart, and glorify Him in everything. (1 Cor. 10:13; John 7:17-18; Col. 3:23-24)

Up again! (and Day 29)

2010-09-24T19:31:00.000-07:00

We went to weigh in again today, and Hope is up to 8lbs 7.5oz! She's doing great! I think it must have been the beer I drank. :) She's doing better each and every day/night with waking up to eat, although she still has 1 really long stretch during the afternoon/evening when it's seriously about impossible to get this girl up & eating. She went 6 hours today. I'm not as concerned about it after today's weigh in, as she's gaining more than that 1/2 - 1 oz/day that the docs look for. Now if we can get that 6 hour stretch to be at night & not during the day, that would be amazing!

Day 29
Pray that your husband will surrender his time and talents to the Lord. Pray that his spiritual gifts
will be manifest in his career, at church, and in your home. (Eph. 5:15-16; 1 Cor. 12:4, 7)

she's gaining!

2010-09-23T02:24:00.000-07:00

We went to have Hope weighed in yesterday and she's up to 8lbs 4oz! Yay! We have to weigh her in again on Friday and then next week at her 2 week appointment. She did GREAT last night - she let me get some sleep and she ate well. I have energy again today!

Day 28
Pray that your husband will be a man of prayer. Pray that he will seek and pursue God in
purposeful quiet times. (1 Thess. 5:17; Luke 22:46; James 5:16)

I am looking forward to getting into more of a routine (I know it will be a while yet...) so I can be more regular in my devotional life as well. I got a new devotional book by John Piper which I am excited to start. For the last few years I have been strictly reading Scripture and some Christian books on the side, but not a real devotional book, so this will be a good change for me.

What are some of your favorite devotional books that you've gone through?

Day 27 & Doctor's orders

2010-09-21T15:48:00.000-07:00

Day 27

Pray that your husband will understand the importance of taking care of his body—the temple ofthe Holy Spirit—for the glory of God. Pray that he will practice self-control by making wise
food choices, and get sufficient exercise to stay healthy. (Rom. 12:1-2; 1 Cor. 6:19-20, 9:27)

I took Hope to the doc today for a checkup. The large bump on her head is essentially a pocket of blood that was caused by labor/delivery. It will go away on it's own and is no cause for concern. Whew.

She does have a mild case of jaundice, but not bad enough to require anything beyond making her eat more and putting her in the daylight for a few days.

Her feeding/sleeping schedule is the biggest issue right now as she's very lazy and lethargic. She is down to 8lbs 1oz (she started at 8lbs 12oz and left the hospital at 8lbs 5oz). The doc is having me pump after each feeding to increase supply and he actually ordered me to drink 1-2 beers before coming back tomorrow to weigh her in. Apparently there is something in beer that helps increase the supply. They actually use the same ingredient in cow feed to increase their supply. So, I feel like livestock, but hey, I get to enjoy a cold Sam Adams Cherry Wheat when my hubby gets home from his class/meeting. Yippeee!!! :)

Another baby!

2010-09-19T16:02:00.000-07:00

We are home and trying to get into a groove as a family of 4 (or more accurately, 5 with Young). Hope slept actually too well on Friday night. She wouldn't wake and wouldn't eat. She hasn't been eating well at all even though she knows how to latch on and nurse. She's just too sleepy to do it. We called the doc last night because she's starting to look a bit jaundice. He wants to see her on Monday so we'll be waking up on time to call and get an appointment.

She also has a 'bubble' on the back of her head. I don't know how else to describe it except that it feels like a very large blister. I'm anxious to find out what that might be as well.

Overall, we're doing well and feeling good. It's worlds different than after having Isaac. God certainly answered my prayers about having a baby who can nurse. I was so anxious we'd have problems again, and while we have a few minor adjustments, we're feeling very blessed.

So, in other family news, my sister in law had a baby on Saturday morning! I was due Sept 3 and she was due Oct 2. We joked about having our kids in the same week as she was early for her last baby and I was late. Lo and behold, same thing happened and our children are less than 3 days apart! What a big week for our family!

Day 26

2010-09-19T10:22:00.001-07:00

Day 26
Pray that your husband will discover and live his God-given purpose. Pray that he will offer all
his dreams to the Lord, and pursue only those goals that will bring God glory and count for
eternity. (Jer. 29:11; 1 Cor. 10:31)

Day 24 & 25 - catching up!

2010-09-17T10:28:00.000-07:00

Day 24
Pray that your husband will have a balanced life—that he will balance work and play. Pray that
he will fear God, but also gain favor with people he knows at work and church. (Luke 2:52;
Prov. 13:15)

Day 25
Pray that your husband will be courageous in his stand against evil and injustice, and that he will
stand for the truth. Pray that he will protect you and your family from Satan’s attacks. (Ps.
31:24; Eph. 6:13; Ps. 27:14)

Her name

2010-09-17T07:53:00.001-07:00

So a few people have asked us how we decided on Hope's name. I have had a list of about 3 or 4 girl names that I've always liked and have since before Isaac was even born. We had a list with those names, a few others Marc added and then a few that I added after going through a name book. Probably a day or two after finding out it was a girl, we started going through the list & crossing off ones that one or both of us no longer liked. We got to 'Hope' (which Marc had originally suggested and I thought was a great middle name, but wasn't convinced) and for some reason it just felt right. Neither of us wanted to take it off, and from that point on, no other name was so perfect for our little girl.

We played around with a few middle names and I decided that I would somehow like Hope to have a part of my name included in her name. My middle name is Anne, but we thought Hope Anne was too short. So began another long list of all the names we could think of that included either 'Anne' or 'Anna'. We came across Anneliese and thus her name was complete!

And, just in case you're wondering, it is pronounced Anne - eliese, not On -a- liese. :)

Hope Anneliese Driesenga

2010-09-16T19:26:00.000-07:00

Our daughter was born on Wednesday, September 15 at 10:12pm. She weighed in at 8lbs 12oz and 21 1/2 inches long. She has a head full of dark wavy hair. For some reason I can't upload pics, so those might have to wait until we're home. Or go check out Marc's facebook.

Around 6:00pm on Wednesday (to follow up my last post) the doc came in and said I had progressed and we would maybe start pitocin soon. As we were standing there talking about what was next, my water broke on it's own! Wow - I am so glad that happened in the hospital and not while walking around Meijer or something like that! Anyhow, my contractions got a lot more intense and regular - about every 2 minutes and lasted for 60-70 seconds each. They watched my contractions and decided I didn't need pitocin at all! I was SO relieved at that. I had been dreading pitocin and had actually been praying my entire pregnancy that I wouldn't need it. God answered...a bit late in the game...but he answered!

I finally gave in and got an epidural around 7:30/7:45pm. Marc told me later that he was surprised I gave in at that point because he felt I was doing so well and dealing well with the contractions. As much as I would like to have gone without, I am glad for the availability of pain meds and happy with my decision to get an epidural.

We called our family and many of them came up around 9 or 9:30pm. We thought that maybe we'd have a baby by midnight, so we didn't tell them to rush at all. I was fully dilated before most of them got there, but my doc wanted me to labor down (allow her head to come down more) a bit before pushing. When my family was in the room, one of them asked me how dilated I was and I told them I'm ready to go & feel like this child could almost fall out. So, with that, they all left the room, the nurse came in and about 5 mintues later I was pushing. It took maybe 10 minutes and 4 contractions and Hope Anneliese was here!

I cannot believe what a difference this experience has been than with Isaac. I am in a better place both physically and emotionally this time and feel so blessed with her arrival.

So far, we think she looks a bit like me - round face, dark & wavy hair (which was me when I was born) but she's just over 24 hours old right now.

Thanks to everyone for your prayers & encouragement as we've been waiting.

I'll get lots of pictures up when we get home and I have my own computer!

5:30pm

2010-09-15T14:36:00.000-07:00

I'm now at a 4 with contractions about 2 minutes apart & somewhat painful. We're waiting to get official orders from the doc, but the nurse was just in to get set up to start pitocin. Things are starting to move!

Oh, and I lost in Boggle to Marc by 3 points and I'm still very hungry. And we know these halls pretty well after doing laps for quite a while earlier.

Sept 15th - 3:00pm

2010-09-15T11:52:00.000-07:00

We're still waiting for something exciting to happen. The overnight cervadil didn't do anything, so we're on to a new med, hoping that it will help me dilate to a point where I can start pitocin. I should be getting checked again in an hour to find out. We're hoping this med does some good. For now, Marc and I are about to either watch a movie or play a riveting game of scrabble. :) Oh, and a little sidenote: I'm REALLY hungry. :(

Day 23 & Hospital update

2010-09-15T06:20:00.000-07:00

Day 23
Pray that your husband will be a good father - disciplining his children wisely and loving them unconditionally. If he is not a father, pray that he will find a young man to mentor in the things of the Lord. (Eph 6:4, Col 3:21, 2 Tim 2:1-2)

Again, it's funny how these prayers align with our lives. Today, we will (hopefully) be having our second child and the prayer today is for Marc to be a good father. It has been such a joy to watch Marc over the last almost 3 years as he has been a father to Isaac. Every time I see him interacting with Isaac, wrestling on the floor, reading books, putting him to bed, taking him to the demolition derby :), it makes me just fall in love more.

In about an hour I'll get 'unhooked' from all the monitors and such and get to take a shower before we start the pitocin. With Isaac, we started pitocin at 11am, the doc broke my water at 2pm, labored until 8:30pm and finally gave in for an epidural, started pushing at 1am and Isaac was born at 4am. I'm REALLY hoping this goes a bit quicker!!!

Uneventful Evening

2010-09-14T20:42:00.001-07:00

It's almost midnight & Marc and I are both reading here in the hospital. We got here just after 8pm and had to go through loads of questions, medical forms, signing papers, etc. They started a medication to help get my body ready (cervadal for those who are interested). That has to be in my system for about 12 hours, so nothing more will probably happen until maybe 10 or 11am Wednesday. In the morning they will check my progression and most likely start the pitocin.

For now, I'm rocking the sweet hospital gown and nice little socks with the grips on them :), reading my first Jodi Picoult book (Plain Truth) and am craving ice cream which I cannot have.

It was strange to not put Isaac to bed tonight and to not have him around. I already miss him. I know he is in good hands at my parents house, but there is that little bit of guilt I have associated with him having to from here on out "share" me with his new sibling.

I think it's time to call the nurse & get that Ambien... Nighty night!

Day 22 - Praying for your Husband

2010-09-14T07:19:00.000-07:00

Day 22
Pray that your husband will practice forgiveness in your relationship and with others. Pray that
he will recognize any roots of bitterness, and yield any resentment and unforgiving attitudes to
the Lord. (Eph. 4:32; Heb. 12:15)

Day 21 & Induction!!

2010-09-13T14:17:00.000-07:00

Day 21
Pray that your husband will learn how to relax in the Lord and, in his greatest times of stress,
find joy and peace in his relationship with God. Pray that he will submit his schedule to the Lord.
(Neh. 8:10; Prov. 17:22; Ps. 16:11)

Wow - seriously? As we are about to start FMLA tomorrow for Marc, the prayer is about his schedule. Ahhh. What a reminder. We have been very frustrated with Marc's work. He has submitted the paperwork, submitted a formal letter and a proposed work schedule to his boss weeks ago. He STILL has not heard anything 'official' about his work schedule. He went in today to talk to his boss (after calling and never hearing back) and sounds like his boss is planning on everything that Marc wrote out, but he just never told him so. I'm not sure how people function like that. It drives me crazy. So, I need to also be reminded to pray for both of our schedules as we bring baby home and transition into life with 2 kids.

And speaking of kids - we are headed to the hospital Tuesday evening at 8pm to start being induced. It was a little frustrating today because the doc said I am only 1-2cm dilated when the doc last week said 2-3cm. I brought up my first ultra sound (which I have brought up before but no one has thought it was significant enough to write down) which put my due date at 9/9. My due date of 9/3 was based on my cycle, which was still messed up from my miscarriage, so I didn't quite trust that date all along, but the docs all went with it. Anyhow, she looked at that US and my 19 week one, which gave me a due date of 9/6. So, overall, I'm probably only 4-7 days past due instead of 10, but my doc feels as though we should induce anyhow.

I'm anxious about it as labor and delivery with Isaac was induced and was quite an ordeal. I'm praying it is quicker and smoother and that we don't have the issues afterward that we did with him.

Please pray for all of us in the next few days!!

Day 20 - Praying for your husband

2010-09-12T10:40:00.000-07:00

Day 20
Pray that your husband will yield his mind and thoughts to the Lord. Pray that he will not
entertain immoral or impure thoughts, and that he will resist the temptation to indulge in
pornography. (Prov. 27:12; 2 Cor. 10:5)

Again this is one of those topics that is still a bit taboo within Christianity. No-one wants to ever admit this is or has been an issue. It's a real temptation for both men and women, and none of us are immune to Satan using this as a way to tempt and ruin relationships. We must all continually have our guard up against his schemes, and admit when we fail.

I have had students both at Plymouth and when I was at Sunshine confess their addiction and/or viewing of pornography. Both guys and girls and as young as 6th grade. This is an issue that I think we all need a little more insight into - especially parents. Of course we want to assume the best of your children, but we also need to be realistic about natural sexual curiosity and the easy access to porn.

As a parent of a very young boy, it's not something that's on my radar quite yet with him, but I realize it will need to be addressed and discussed at an early but appropriate age.I already pray constantly for Isaac's purity and for him to be free from sexual sin. It's hard to think of my little boy succumbing to those temptations as he grows up, but I also realize that prayer is one tool I have to help prevent that. And so I pray over him often. I also pray for his wife and her purity as well.

Day 19

2010-09-11T12:03:00.000-07:00

Day 19
Pray that your husband will be patient and a man of peace. Pray that he will not give in to anger,
but will allow the Holy Spirit to control his responses. (Rom. 14:19; Ps. 34:14)

haha - praying for patience when I'm 8 days overdue...how appropriate.

Day 18 - Praying for your Husband

2010-09-10T12:18:00.000-07:00

Day 18
Pray that your husband will have an eternal perspective—living in light of eternity. Pray that he
will reject materialism and temporal values and put God first in his life. (Matt. 6:33; Deut. 6:5;
Eph. 5:16; Ps. 90:12)

Day 17 - Prayers for strength

2010-09-09T14:11:00.000-07:00

Day 17
Pray that your husband will enjoy his manliness as he patterns his life after Christ and strong
men in the faith. Pray for his physical, emotional, mental, social and spiritual strength. (Eph.
3:16; 1 Peter 2:21; 1 Cor. 10:11)

Shoot, I'm certainly praying this for both of us today! I'm needing all the strength I can get after finding out my doc won't induce til next week! I'm 6 days over right now and we are just continuing to wait. I have another non-stress test on Monday at 11am followed by a doc visit. I'll see my doc who delivered Isaac on Monday, and I'm seriously hoping that she says, "follow me - we'll walk across the street to the hospital & get things started right now". :) I've been praying all pregnancy to not be induced, so I'm still truly hoping that this little one will decide to come on his/her own this weekend, but I'm getting mentally prepared for an induction at the same time.

Please pray for us as we wait!

Day 16 - Praying for your husband

2010-09-08T08:06:00.000-07:00

Day 16
Pray that your husband will choose healthy, God-honoring activities. Pray that he will not live in
bondage to any questionable habits or hobbies, but that he will experience freedom in holiness as
he yields to the Spirit’s control. (1 Cor. 6:12, 10:31; 2 Tim. 2:4)

Waiting & Day 15

2010-09-07T07:31:00.000-07:00

Day 15
Pray that your husband will choose his friends wisely. Pray that God will bring him men who
will encourage his accountability before God, and will not lead him into sin. (Prov. 13:20; Prov.
27:17)

I am really looking forward to when Marc has time for friends. We have such limited time together as a family, which leaves Marc about zero time for any friends. I know this is an area he is missing out on because of work/school, but only 4 more months!

And in baby news: Still waiting. I'm 2-3cm and everything is looking good & ready to go. Just waiting for some strong contractions to move things along. I have a non-stress test on Thursday to make sure baby is still doing fine and then another appointment to figure things out from there. My doc didn't even mention induction today, which was somewhat okay with me. I know we'll talk about it Thursday, but I really am hoping little one decides to come before then.

Happy 30th & Day 14

2010-09-06T06:54:00.000-07:00

Day 14
Pray that your husband will speak words that build you and your family, and reflect a heart of
love. Pray that he will not use filthy language. (Prov. 18:21; Eph. 4:29)

Happy Birthday to my wonderful husband!! He has finally joined me in the land of the 30's! Ha! We hadn't really planned anything to do today, as we were REALLY hoping to either have a newborn or to be in the hospital. Not sure either of those will be true today, so I'm trying to think of something to do that is cheap, not too high-energy, and easy to do with a 2 year old. Hmmm.

We did celebrate a bit with family on Saturday and on Sunday, and I did already make a bittersweet chocolate bunt cake from scratch, so hopefully I'm not a completely slacker wife.

Marc & Isaac just took off to run a few errands and give me some alone time. I think when they return I'm going to try to imitate a Wolfgangs menu item that I love. I don't recall they're crazy name for it, but essentially it's banana bread french toast with banana's and peanut butter on top. We'll see how that turns out!

And in the baby department, I'm overdue, uncomfortable and very ready to meet this little one. I have an appointment tomorrow morning at 8:30 so we'll see what the doc says. My guess is that they'll schedule a US and Non-stress test for tomorrow or Wednesday and maybe induce next weekend. I had a dream last night that they did an US and changed my due date to October 8!!! There was a lot of crying and screaming in my dream. I'll keep you all posted!

Day 13 - Praying for your Husband

2010-09-05T15:59:00.001-07:00

Day 13
Pray that your husband use practical skills to build your family and make wise decisions for your
welfare. Pray that he will serve unselfishly. (Gal. 5:13; Phil. 2:3-4)

Day 12 - Praying for your husband

2010-09-04T17:38:00.000-07:00

Day 12
Pray that your husband will yield his sexual drive to the Lord and practice self control. Pray that
your sexual intimacy together will be fresh, positive, and a reflection of selfless love. (Prov.
5:15, 18; 1 Cor. 7:3; Song of Solomon 7:10)

Day 11 - Praying for your Husband

2010-09-03T06:14:00.000-07:00

Day 11
Pray that your husband will have a humble, teachable spirit and a servant’s heart before the Lord.
Pray that he will listen to God and desire to do His will. (Prov. 15:33; Eph. 6:6)

I'm 1/3 of the way through 30 days of praying for Marc. It has truly been an encouraging habit for me to get into practicing. I have found that I'm praying more not only for Marc, but for others as well. I love having a clear direction of what to pray for my husband each day. And I think putting it it on my blog daily has been a strange, technological accountability.

I hope others are taking on this challenge as well. If so, leave a comment of how this experience has been for you!