I can't say that the full burden of Quimby street is off my shoulders, but it's certainly off one of them! I met with one of the guys today to go over the lease. He signed & is bringing it to the other two to sign as well. Move in date:May 20. A little later than we'd like, but better something than nothing. I'm realizing something could still happen to throw a wrench in this plan, but feeling mostly hopeful and some relief.
So, kinda humorous that my realtor called this afternoon to tell me we have a showing at Quimby tomorrow evening. I truly don't think anything like this will happen, but wouldn't it just be hilarious if we have a signed lease & an offer in the same week? ha!
In other random news, my house is a mess and has been continually in a mess and I'm okay with it. It really does drive me crazy, but I keep thinking that as soon as Marc is done with classes, our lives will settle and there will be more time for things like cleaning. We're all happy & healthy so a messy house isn't on the top of my list of concerns. 5 weeks + exams and we're in summer break mode. Can't wait!
Monday, March 29, 2010
Wednesday, March 24, 2010
Hello energy, I've missed you!
As I was talking to a friend the other day, I realized I haven't had this much energy since mid-September.
September through late October: pregnant in 1st tri = exhausted.
Late October through mid-December = miscarriage & emotionally exhausted + Quimby & phsycially tired.
Mid-December - late February: pregnant in 1st tri & the holiday's = once again exhausted.
MARCH = 2nd trimester & the return of long lost friend, energy.
The first few weeks of March I was realizing my energy levels were up, but I hadn't changed any sleeping/living habits. I had gotten so used to allowing myself to rest a lot that it turned into a bit of laziness. Last week that all changed though. I have a strict & consistant bedtime now, a consistant wake up time and have found that I am becoming more disciplined in other areas of my life as well. I have gotten Isaac into more of a consistant routine as well, and I have really noticed a difference with how he & I function together now. It's been great!
I realize that 3rd trimester is only a few short months away, and then comes baby, so this may not last, but I am certainly enjoying it for now.
September through late October: pregnant in 1st tri = exhausted.
Late October through mid-December = miscarriage & emotionally exhausted + Quimby & phsycially tired.
Mid-December - late February: pregnant in 1st tri & the holiday's = once again exhausted.
MARCH = 2nd trimester & the return of long lost friend, energy.
The first few weeks of March I was realizing my energy levels were up, but I hadn't changed any sleeping/living habits. I had gotten so used to allowing myself to rest a lot that it turned into a bit of laziness. Last week that all changed though. I have a strict & consistant bedtime now, a consistant wake up time and have found that I am becoming more disciplined in other areas of my life as well. I have gotten Isaac into more of a consistant routine as well, and I have really noticed a difference with how he & I function together now. It's been great!
I realize that 3rd trimester is only a few short months away, and then comes baby, so this may not last, but I am certainly enjoying it for now.
Thursday, March 18, 2010
16 weeks
I had my 3rd appointment today (16 weeks tomorrow). I did the typical pee in a cup, get blood pressure, etc and then time for the heartbeat. The nurse spent a good 3-4 minutes looking for it. Then she said the doppler battery was low, so maybe that was why she couldn't get it. She got another one & tried again for 2-3 minutes with no luck. She said that maybe the doc could find it otherwise we would need an ultrasound. After having a miscarriage in October, and having heard the heartbeat 4 weeks ago at my appointment, I immediately thought things were doomed. I was scared & was holding back tears.
So, the nurse left and I was in the room waiting for the doc to come try to get the heartbeat.
25 MINUTES LATER he finally shows up!!! I spent 25 minutes in prayer, worrying, wondering, scared, emotional...that was the worst waiting I've ever experienced. Seriously doc, don't do this to ANY woman, let alone someone who has already had a loss.
He spent about 3 minutes looking & FINALLY we heard little bean's heartbeat pumping away at 164!! Whew. Baby even moved around a little for me to hear - as if to say, "don't worry mom, I'm all good in here!"
I got to schedule my next appointment and ultrasound for Friday, April 16th, so only 4 more weeks of wondering if little one is a boy or a girl.
Overall, a good apointment, just a little bit of a scare!
Oh, and by the way, Marc is determined that we are not going to tell people if it's a boy or a girl. I'm really not sure I can keep it in, but I guess I have to try!
So, the nurse left and I was in the room waiting for the doc to come try to get the heartbeat.
25 MINUTES LATER he finally shows up!!! I spent 25 minutes in prayer, worrying, wondering, scared, emotional...that was the worst waiting I've ever experienced. Seriously doc, don't do this to ANY woman, let alone someone who has already had a loss.
He spent about 3 minutes looking & FINALLY we heard little bean's heartbeat pumping away at 164!! Whew. Baby even moved around a little for me to hear - as if to say, "don't worry mom, I'm all good in here!"
I got to schedule my next appointment and ultrasound for Friday, April 16th, so only 4 more weeks of wondering if little one is a boy or a girl.
Overall, a good apointment, just a little bit of a scare!
Oh, and by the way, Marc is determined that we are not going to tell people if it's a boy or a girl. I'm really not sure I can keep it in, but I guess I have to try!
Monday, March 15, 2010
Cloth vs Disposable
So, I'm considering switching to cloth diapers for this next little one. I'm going to a class on Saturday to learn the ins & outs and have gotten some great insight from my sis-in-law, who is a also a working mom. Any thoughts from anyone out there who has used cloth? Tips & pointers? Product suggestions?
http://www.hopscotchstore.com/index.asp?ShopCat=Diapering
http://www.hopscotchstore.com/index.asp?ShopCat=Diapering
Wednesday, March 10, 2010
Over my pity party
I'm over my little rant from last week. Thanks for bearing with me through a tough & emotional day. I should be much quicker in the future to share with you God's provision and faithfulness. So my last post was Tuesday. On Wednesday, I came home from work to find something stuck in the handle of my garage door. I thought perhaps it was a flier for some local business or something. Was I WAY off! It was an envelope that said "rent help" on it. Now, call me naive, or foolish, or whatever you want, but at this point I thought, "hmm, maybe someone writing a letter requesting rent help & putting it here because this is the parsonage". (Yes, we've gotten many requests by random people stopping by this house in the past, so it's not totally unlikely!). Wrong again. $500 cash. WHAT!?!?!?!?!
SERIOUSLY??? I was beyond tears at this point (probably because I cried them all out on Tuesday - they came later that evening though). I was just in shock. I literally could not speak for about 3-4 minutes. Who in the world was this mystery gift giver? How did they know? Who in the world has an extra $500 laying around to help me? Who am I to deserve such help? It was just completely overwhelming, in a very good way. I am blessed beyond belief. Between that and the check we got for hosting another exchange student, we are able to once again this month pay our rent and our mortgage. God did it in February, and he did it again in March. Our God is WAY bigger than our problems, no matter how big those may seem.
This gift has spurred me on once again towards praying for relief from debt. I'm not expecting God to take away our school loans or anything like that, but I am praying that God helps us reduce our debt quickly, and that he gives us wisdom with our finances. I CANNOT WAIT until we can bless someone else the way that we have been blessed. If my anonymous gift giver is reading this, bless you and thank you, and know that when we are able, we will be paying it forward. Whoa. What a faithful God we serve.
SERIOUSLY??? I was beyond tears at this point (probably because I cried them all out on Tuesday - they came later that evening though). I was just in shock. I literally could not speak for about 3-4 minutes. Who in the world was this mystery gift giver? How did they know? Who in the world has an extra $500 laying around to help me? Who am I to deserve such help? It was just completely overwhelming, in a very good way. I am blessed beyond belief. Between that and the check we got for hosting another exchange student, we are able to once again this month pay our rent and our mortgage. God did it in February, and he did it again in March. Our God is WAY bigger than our problems, no matter how big those may seem.
This gift has spurred me on once again towards praying for relief from debt. I'm not expecting God to take away our school loans or anything like that, but I am praying that God helps us reduce our debt quickly, and that he gives us wisdom with our finances. I CANNOT WAIT until we can bless someone else the way that we have been blessed. If my anonymous gift giver is reading this, bless you and thank you, and know that when we are able, we will be paying it forward. Whoa. What a faithful God we serve.
Tuesday, March 2, 2010
I want a beer.
Okay, Okay, I know having a drink will not change/solve anything. But after a day like today, having a cold drink does sound quite refreshing. Oh well. 6-7 more months before that will happen.
I feel like I'm at the end of my rope. I am at a loss of what to do about Quimby. March is the 6th month of it sitting empty. 6 MONTHS of dealing with this stress. 6 Months of saturdays spent not as a family, but working on the house. 6 months of making minimum payments on everything instead of making progress on our debt. 6 months of desperate prayers. I am exhausted. And today, after having another no-show, I'm not sure I can keep it all together. I've been fighting to be strong, I've been trying to remain positive and hopeful, but I'm sinking fast.
Am I doing something wrong? We have been tithing regularly and I feel that we try to be faithful with our money - we don't go on extravagent vacations, we don't eat out unless it's with coupons or gift cards, we have family watch Isaac to save money... WHAT ARE WE DOING WRONG?
We have been praying for God's provision, praying for renters, and whether right or wrong, I have maybe said a prayer or two that God would stike down Quimby with a fire...yes, seriously.
I have been humbled by being in a situation of needing to take 'hand -outs' from friends, family and even the church. I have been humbled by having to email those same people week after week asking for help with Isaac, or help with painting, or whatever project we were working on at the time. It's hard to admit we can't afford to hire the work out. It's humbling. It's humbling to show our whole church family that we certainly do not live at the same level as most of them do. It's almost been embarassing for so many people to go to Quimby and see the neighborhood we chose to buy and live in. Everyone comments about how bad of a neighborhood it is, and that hurts to some extent. That's all we could afford, and I'm sorry it's not middle class. We are not middle class.
I sometimes feel like less of a person because of our situation. I'm just so done and so overwhelmed.
We need prayers desperately. I need prayers desperately. Especially today. I just can't handle it today.
I feel like I'm at the end of my rope. I am at a loss of what to do about Quimby. March is the 6th month of it sitting empty. 6 MONTHS of dealing with this stress. 6 Months of saturdays spent not as a family, but working on the house. 6 months of making minimum payments on everything instead of making progress on our debt. 6 months of desperate prayers. I am exhausted. And today, after having another no-show, I'm not sure I can keep it all together. I've been fighting to be strong, I've been trying to remain positive and hopeful, but I'm sinking fast.
Am I doing something wrong? We have been tithing regularly and I feel that we try to be faithful with our money - we don't go on extravagent vacations, we don't eat out unless it's with coupons or gift cards, we have family watch Isaac to save money... WHAT ARE WE DOING WRONG?
We have been praying for God's provision, praying for renters, and whether right or wrong, I have maybe said a prayer or two that God would stike down Quimby with a fire...yes, seriously.
I have been humbled by being in a situation of needing to take 'hand -outs' from friends, family and even the church. I have been humbled by having to email those same people week after week asking for help with Isaac, or help with painting, or whatever project we were working on at the time. It's hard to admit we can't afford to hire the work out. It's humbling. It's humbling to show our whole church family that we certainly do not live at the same level as most of them do. It's almost been embarassing for so many people to go to Quimby and see the neighborhood we chose to buy and live in. Everyone comments about how bad of a neighborhood it is, and that hurts to some extent. That's all we could afford, and I'm sorry it's not middle class. We are not middle class.
I sometimes feel like less of a person because of our situation. I'm just so done and so overwhelmed.
We need prayers desperately. I need prayers desperately. Especially today. I just can't handle it today.
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