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I should be 15 weeks pregnant today. It's been a bit of a rough evening as I remembered. It's been just over a month and some days I don't even think about it. Others it's on my mind constantly. It's not helping that we're not able to start trying again yet. I'm anxious about the future and our family. I'm fearful that it could happen again. I'm tired. I feel like since it happened, I haven't been on top of anything. Today, I missed a meeting that had been rescheduled because I missed it last week. That's the story of the last 5 weeks. I haven't been using my planner and feel like I'm always doing things last minute, which is not like me. I've been lazy, unproductive and just kind of blah. I really hope this changes soon.